#i tell myself that maybe she wasn't expecting to fight that day and was wearing her uniform for formality

[dirtydoctorwho]

Screen caps of our girl in DS:itMoM

[missmarveledsblog]

THE BABYSITTING TRAP (18+)

Summary:  the gang made  a plan to set steve up and Y/n hopper up, did they expect it to go so well ?

Warning : smut , soft dom steve , praise kink , daddy kink , hair pulling   , spanking just steve unleashing his inner eddie to be fair . also everything nancy did and tension during season 4 we're just going to pretend it was us instead.  steve being fluffier than his hair . this is 18+ minors not welcome

As far as failed night go , he was starting to think this was possibly could be the best night of his life.  All he had to do was well  tell her how  he felt . which kinda was hard to do watching to move around her trailer wearing his t-shirt  making them popcorn  to watch a movie alone , together . the girl of his dreams , one that stood by everything , one who appreciated him .  little thing she would do told him as much  when they were hanging as group. she stop them teasing him about his failed love life , made sure eddie didn't eat his favourite snacks if he was running late , hell even having his favourite snacks there .  how she would actually listen to what he had to say during the whole upside down situation .  checking his wounds and making sure everything was healing  or cleaned properly.  how when he was pulled under water she was straight in after .. maybe shit he was idiot . the kids were right and it was right in front of him the whole time . he for once didn't think of his action , when she came over he helped her with placing the things down not before pulling her on to his lap and  cuddling her close , god her giggles made his day, a melody he could listen to on repeat he was sure of it .  " what has gotten into you harrington, not that i'm complaining  " her smile , that damned smile could make anyone's day brighter  . " something that took me way too long to do " he said proud his voice didn't squeak or waver  . " and what would that be " god he had the usually confident teasing yet kind and caring y/n nervous.  " taking that step   ,  a step we both wanted , to finally stop kidding myself and finally go after the girl i want so bad it physically hurts sometimes , making sure no one can take her away " he smiled leaning up and capturing her lips with his .  she wanted to punch herself the shit she  used to say about how ridiculous movie kissing was bullshit . she could literally eat her words with how wrong she was .  how his lips against hers felt like they were meant to be there . two puzzle pieces connect to reveal the whole picture. souls reconnecting after eternity searching for  each other , nerves coming to life , fire work the lot . 

Needing air they reluctantly pulled back , both shit eating grins on there faces .  " about time harrington i was beginning to lose hope " she sighed dramatically head falling against his chest. " hey you could have said something you know " he defended finger lifting her chin to make her eyes align with his . " maybe i was scared " she bit her lip which wasn't a lie  , she'd been the same telling the group they were seeing things .  " well i was was terrified , i mean imagine losing this beautiful , kind , sweetheart , kinda an asshole sarcastic woman and one of my best friends because i told her i love her so much it drive me insane" he bared it all everything he was feeling over the years . " wait love " she sat up looking at him fully searching his eyes  making sure it wasn't some stupid prank between him and the kids or eddie .  " love like full blown burn the world down for you love " he  repeated .  what words failed , actions didn't she crashed her lips against his  hungrily showing him how much she loved him , how he made her go on when she thought she couldn't , how he gave her the strength to fight when she felt weak . steve harrington held a place in her heart  since the moment she met him , those puppy brown eyes had her locked , hook , line and sinker .  she pulled the back of his neck in a bid to get closer , while her skin burned with a need  only he could satisfy .    a quick turn of positions and she was now straddling the man she dreamed about for so long .  steve kissed back harder like she was his only source of oxygen while his hands land on her hip pulling her closer .  like it was on instinct her hips rolled making the man  under let out the sexiest almost primal moan she had ever heard . it was surreal she had steve the hair harrington moaning beneath her .   " if we gonna do this baby girl then we are going to need that bed of yours " a husk almost whisper against her ear making her whimper. steve harrington made her  give out the neediest whimper  something she wasn't aware could happen.  " take me to bed steve " she moaned feeling his strain against his jeans . 

without be breaking the kiss , he lifted her effortlessly up off the chair , holding her steady as he kissed down her neck  the t-shirt he love seeing on  her was now in his way . she could feel her skin almost burn with desire pulling the shirt over her head showing  the pink lace bra hiding underneath . " i definitely died and now in heaven" he teased kissed down her chest as he hand pushed her bedroom door open and kicking it closed . laying her softly on the bed as she pulled her shorts off . " eager are we " he smirked seeing the lust blown eyes , kiss bitten lips and it was all for him .  " please steve fuck touch me , kiss me do something " she kneeled before him pulling him by his waist band .    "yeah i died and this is heaven " he growled pushing her on her back while giving her almost a bruising kiss .  licking , biting down her neck as he unclasped her bra sitting up to admire her , the dream he had were nothing in comparison to the real deal. " fuck you are so beautiful baby girl " his hand giving teasing pinches to her now hardened peaks .  " oh you like that huh baby" he grin bowing his head . at first it teasing kitten licks , before a hiss broken moan came from her lips feeling him sucking and  biting her nipples soft mouth making her core throb with a need . her panties drenched at the way he handled her in such as short space of time.  she felt a fire burn deeper when his kissing began to continue down her body .   even touch of his lips felt like her wildest dreams coming to life yet it still wasn't enough she needed more of him , all of him . " can i take these off"  he asked a false coyness lilt to his deep husky voice. " fuck yes please i need you " she whimpered . " oh baby girl daddy's gonna take care of you , be a good girl and sit back while i eat this little pussy of yours,  can you do that " fuck this was definitely a dream ." yes daddy i'll be good " .   she hissed feeling his finger sliding up and down painful slow yet not even where she wanted . " all this for me such a good girl ..mmm you taste fucking heavenly i knew you would my sweet beautiful girl " he moaned tongue swirling tasting her slick . never did he think he would have her  tasting so sweet on his tongue dancing on his taste buds it was safe to say he was already addicted. " mm fuck daddy " she cried feeling his tongue swirl around her puffy clit sending her head crashing against the pillow  the pulling his hair and her back arching at the sensation . steve harrington ate pussy like it was a five course meal and his last meal all in one . she felt her coil tighten and windup so tight she almost screamed when it snapped making his actions faster lapping up her orgasim . " fuck i'm doing that daily fucking hell baby you taste so good " he groaned wiping her juices from his face.  

" now i need to be in that pussy because i near damn came in my fucking boxers like a little virgin , can i fuck you my sweet girl " he smiled down seeing her blissed out face.  she couldn't speak all her mind consisted of was him and him needing to be inside her . " too cock drunk speak  that's ok daddy will take care of you " he growled teasing his cock through her folds coating him up ,underestimating his own control but slowly he began pushing in , feeling the softness of her walls  it was like she was made for him and him  alone .  she couldn't help the pleading and begging that flew out of her mouth nor if someone told her this would happen she'd laugh in their face yet here she was doing just that  .  " FUCK" she cried as he began to thrust hitting spots in her body she never knew where there ,  her nails  scraping down his back in a bid to pull him closer anyway she could but what surprised her most was when he pinned her hands above her head , fucking her into the mattress like it was his main goal in life  turning her on more that she even thought was possible . babbles and moans filling the room along with the filthiness spewing from the  mans mouth .  " daddy fuck just like that " she cried wanting to grab him but hell even the restricted movement made it better somehow. he let go of her hands gliding them down pinching her nipples as he passed them before he began circling her clit  . " we cum together baby i can feel it  " he growled as she clenched around . " now " his thrust sloppy then she felt his cum filling her up painting ever part of her cervix as she herself clenched down milking ever part of it .  " fuck that was...." she panted . " totally happening every chance we get .. i totally agree" he joked pulling out of her. " steve you know i love you too right .. so much it drives me insane " she leaned up lasily kissing him as he pulled her to his chest .  

bonus : 

" i'm not going in there but it's safe to say the plan worked and dustin is traumatise " robin nodded face in pure disgust. " who knew harrington was a kinky fuck " eddie smirked . " can we please just go " dustin whispered . " come on we can get the money of steve for therapy " robin led him toward eddies van . " HARRINGTON YOU ARE MY HERO " eddie yelled in . " munson come on before henderson barfs in your van " robin hissed. 

[autumnbell32]

*tw: depression, SI talk

I Don't Wear Mascara Anymore

I want to live, I just can't handle living at this point. And trying to explain that distinction to doctors is tricky business. "Please help me BEFORE I get to this point," I've begged over and over again. Even when you aren't at that point, even mentioning that point is risky because there isn't any room for talking about it. I can't speak for everyone, but living in the silence of long term mental illness is deafening- you literally lose any source of human noise around you. People stop understanding you, people expect you to stop talking about it even though it puts a grey veil over all of your days, people blame you, people get frustrated, people go away. Especially if it has been a long battle. I didn't choose this battle, but the fact that I keep choosing to fight it also gets stifled in the silence.

I sent a message to my doctor a few days ago telling him that these mood cycles- especially since they are happening around my period almost every month- aren't sustainable for me anymore. No one should expect me just to be ok with building myself up for two weeks out of the month, only to fall again for the last two weeks. I'm trying to do my part- I workout three days a week, I still go to work, etc etc etc. I walk talk and breathe. I slip up, though, when the symptoms are bad- I numb out with glucose because there isn't really any comfort in my life. And I'm in therapy to address that. I made my motivation very clear in the message- I will do more work to lessen the symptoms of this illness, but I can't do it alone and I can't continue on this particular path. I need my doctor's help- maybe he needs to recognize that functioning does not nullify suffering. I'm suffering immensely.

I was met with a call from the nurse saying I needed to go to the ER. "Why? I'm not su*cidal, I'm not going to hurt anyone else, and the doctor said I'm medication resistant so what would the point be? I don't fit the criteria." The nurse put me on hold and put an NP, who I have never in my life talked to, on the phone to school me on the legality of making sure I'm safe. And to ask me what I expect an 8-5 doctor's office to actually do for me. And to tell me she wasn't even sure there is anything that could help me anymore.

The answer can't always be hospitalization, there are a lot of us that are resilient but still suffering and I wish doctors would stop being comfortable with their script pads and inpatient orders. There is a portion of us that that does not help anymore, so we get written off in another way. Maybe it is just the people in my life, I'd be so glad to know that others struggling with long term mental illness have people to be patient with them and remind them of who they are. But people in my life are ok with me remaining silent and hidden. Realizing that you might be another face that fades someday because of a mental illness is an immediate gut drop. Every time I have realized that possibility, I see myself standing at the mouth of some source of human existence and I swear I feel ego death (and not in a good way).

After seeing my screen name in a depression support chat, another member noted that it is a reference to a piece of classic literature. "Yes, it is," I responded. And then I cried, because intractable mental illness makes you forget yourself- your preferences, your humanity (you become walking pain). You lose your visibility. Even if you do remember, those things aren't easily accessible when sick. Jesus, even I am getting sick of talking about all of this. Scream into the void long enough, and you are going to lose your fucking voice.

My name is Ashley and I love classic literature and horror movies and warm, rainy days and the smell of peonies and baking and helping others and weird 80s-inspired synth music and running and animals. I'm hoping that, someday in the near future, I will want to fill my apartment with plants and be semi-good at trail running and I will want to write most days and I will have a partner that will show me what love without immense pain looks like and I will want to cook for myself more and I will be able to travel and I will be able to recover some of the life that I have lost. My name is Ashley and, someday soon, I hope that I will be able to make it through a day without crying.

[countrymusiclover]

15 - Strolling through the Kingdom

Part 16

A God Worthy Soulmate

@queenieala

A few days later

Staring at the dress laying on the bed I shake my head not thinking it was necessary to have all these things. Since my parents abandoned me I have barely had anything this nice. "Ken, I can't accept this. One dress or crown is enough."

Ken was quite persistent on me wearing the dress claiming I was his queen and had to dress the part now but in truth I was no queen I was just a young hybrid girl that came from nowhere."I have said it once and I will say it again, Clarisse. You deserve this because you're my queen."

Turning on my heels he was leaning in the doorway just smiling at me. " This looks like something a goddess would wear and I don't want to pretend to be someone I'm not."

"You don't have to pretend to be anything. You just have to be yourself." He replied walking across the room and tucking some hair behind my ear gently.

Tilting my head to the side I sighed heavily at him. " Alright if it pleases you then I shall wear it "

He smiled when I turned my back to him, glaring at him since he was still standing there. "I'm not gonna change while you're in here."

" It's nothing I haven't seen before, " he teased.

" Ken, you've only seen me with no shirt!" I scolded, crossing my arms against my chest.

" Hopefully I'll be able to unravel you one day " Ken smiled.

"Maybe you will soon but it depends on your manners, " I teased with a light smirk.

Ken stood still and I could tell he was fighting himself to not push me back onto the bed right then before he stepped into the hallway closing the door.

I let out an amused chuckle at his reaction before changing into the dress, I slid on the dress and started to layer it out.

I made my way to the vanity and started at my reflection and noticed how revealing the dress made my figure stand out more.

" Gosh, what am I doing…. I'm not like this I don't dress like a prostitute " I thought to myself.

But the dress truly suited me and I began to love how I looked, for the first time in forever I felt beautiful and confident.

I picked up the golden crown that he left me on the vanity and placed it on my head and grabbed a beautiful golden necklace, clicking it around my neck.

"Wow, he's making you look like a goddess, Clari." Whipping my head around I nearly screamed seeing Lizzie standing in front of me.

"Lizzie, what - how are you here?"

She smiled, hands clasped together in front of her. "Astral projection, silly. Now onto serious business do we need to come and try and rescue?"

" I don't need any rescuing Liz, I went with him willingly " I responded.

Her eyes widened in shock at my response and soon a frown appeared on her face, " What, why would you go with him

" Because I want to…. I can't deny my feelings for him anymore and I don't want to be with anyone else " I mumbled.

My heretic best friend just stared at me blankly for a few minutes. Normally she always knew what to say or would just keep talking. But not now. "Woah I wasn't expecting that….does that mean you've slept with him and are never coming to the school. To your family?"

"I'm not abandoning you guys, Lizzie."

" Well, it doesn't look that way to me… it seems he has really turned you over to his side now… I mean look at you you're practically dressed like some goddess " Lizzie commented.

Dropping my hands at my sides I blurted out the deal we made that I hadn't planned to tell her this way. "He agreed to not kill you all because I am dressing like this, living here, being his queen and whatever else. I saved your lives in a way!" Staring at her I kept going off. ""Look, I'm sorry okay but for the first in forever I actually feel beautiful and loved…he's not the villain."

Lizzie shakes her head twisting some pieces of her loose hair giving me a confused look. "You can't be serious, Clari?"

"I am Lizzie…because I think - I might love him. I'm not really sure."

" You don't love him Clari, … he's obviously manipulating you into staying " Lizzie exclaimed.

" He isn't the right guy for you Clari " she added.

"Then who is the right one huh. Because the only other guy I got close to I accidentally triggered my werewolf curse. So I'm crappy at romance!"

" Well, Ethan is interested in you and is more better for you…. Ken isn't capable of love he uses women and throws them away like trash and When he gets what he wants from you he'll throw you away too and move onto the next woman, he's a God Clari… gods are cruel and selfish and only cares for their selfish needs " Lizzie states.

Crossing my arms over my chest I scoffed lightly. "People said the same things about Hope's dad and he ended up sacrificing himself for love.

" That's entirely different and you know it " Lizzie repiled.

" Clari please just come home…. leave him he doesn't care for you," the Heretic pleaded with her friend.

Ken knocked on the door pulling me away from our conversation. "Clarisse, are you ready?"

"I have to go Lizzie." I held up my hand heading for the door.

" Go on, your king is calling to you…. your grace " Lizzie said in a mocking tone before her projection disappeared.

Opening the door I clutched my hands into fists and Ken clearly noticed seeing I was in a mood. "What's upset you, Clarisse?"

"Nothing that should bother you. So what are we doing today? More horseback riding?"

" No, I think it's about time that Vallahra learns that it has a queen among them in other words my love, I want to show you around our kingdom "

" Your kingdom you mean " I corrected him.

" Our kingdom " He said, grabbing my hand with his.

Tilting my head down I got embarrassed feeling my chest tighten. He and I were very different when it came to dealing with pressure. "You're not helping me not be nervous. I don't have your ego if you remember correctly."

He tugged me against his chest kissing my forehead. "You'll get used to being like me one day. "

Avoiding his gaze I thought of Lizzie. Maybe a small part of her knew something I didn't. But he wasn't forcing my hand on most things. "How can you assume that your supposed subjects will like me?"

" They know not to fall out of line " he simply said.

"Are you a drill Sergeant now? They're not your soldiers in the military." I rolled my eyes, being a tease with a smirk.

" I'm their king and they are my subjects…. every ruler wishes for the loyalty of their subjects. Luckily for me my subjects respect and fear me enough to stay in line " Ken responded.

" Have you ever actually interacted with your subjects or gotten to know them? " I asked.

" No, " he scoffed.

" Well, today that changes, " I said with a determined look.

" Shall we " I said, staring at him who nodded leading us out of the room and downstairs where we made our way outside of the castle where the same guy from yesterday greeted us.

Beside him was a grand golden carriage on top with a coachman.

"Your graces, your carriage you have requested " The man said bowing , stepping aside.

" Good " Ken grinned.

" Thank you " I said with a smile at the man.

" Np, your grace I live to serve you and his grace in any way " the man responded.

" What's your name? " I asked curiously.

" Um, Leon, your grace, '' the man replied.

" Well, Leon, thank you again, " I responded, raising a brow towards him with a cheeky grin. "See, was that hard?"

He rolls his eyes helping me into the carriage where the ride was silent until we got into town. Putting my hand in his he helped me down before my gaze shifted up seeing some of the people staring at me oddly. From the way Ken talked he clearly doesn't interact with many of them. "Um Hi, I'm Clarisse."

"Are you the queen?" One little kid asked, standing beside his mother.

"She will be someday. Queen Clarisse." Ken declared wrapping his arms around my waist tugging me against his chest.

" Well, no I'm just a young girl " I answered smiling at the young boy.

" You look like a queen to me " the boy commented.

Dropping on a knee to be his level I smiled. "Awe thank you. What's your name?"

" Tobias, your grace " The boy said bowing. "My mommy's name is Mandy." He pointed towards his mother who was holding onto his other hand.

" It's nice to meet you, your son is adorable " I said.

" Thank you, your grace, " the woman smiled.

I was about to say something until Ken led me away from the people and towards a small backers shop. Stepping inside my nose immediately got filled with the smell of different types of desserts. Rushing towards the glass case I smelled brownies that almost looked similar to the ones Lizzie and I both liked. "Why didn't you take me into town sooner. You shouldn't keep a girl from her treats ."

"I'll keep that in mind, love." Ken chuckled at my excitement.

" Oh, crap I don't have any money with me " I signed.

Soon, a nice woman stepped in front of the corner and immediately bowed when she noticed the king was in her shop.

" Your grace, how can I serve you today? " the woman said.

" My queen here wishes to try one of your delicious brownies, " Ken said.

Glaring at his direction I wasn't as quick to call myself a queen. "Clarisse is fine. But yes I would like to try one. How much is it I have some money in one of my old coats let me go grab it I'll be back "

I was about to walk out of the bakery until Ken stopped me, " You don't have to pay for anything my love "

" Yes, your grace please, it's my treat " the woman smiled at me kindly before opening the glass case and grabbed one of the brownies with a napkin before handing it to me.

" Are you sure ma'am, I can pay for it " I said..

" It's my honor to serve you, your grace " the woman said.

" Thank you " I said with a small smile biting into the brownie she handed me. The treat tasted just like I remembered. "I will pay you back in some way, ma'am."

Ken rested a hand on my back once we stepped out of the shop giving me a confused look that I insisted on paying her. "I don't understand why you think she needs money."

"Unlike you I have some manners and people like me in foster care were taught to give money if something gives you something. It's the polite thing, Ken."

" Don't you support your people " I asked but already knew the answer to that question. He just stares blankly giving me my answer.

" I guess I already know what you'll answer going to be… can we head back to the castle now I'm kind of tired " I said, staring at him.

" Clari " he tried to say but I didn't answer him and began making my way back to the castle on foot not really wanting to take the carriage back with him.

" Maybe Lizzie was right, perhaps he isn't capable of love for anyone else but his own needs " I thought sadly.

Ken watched her go knowing that he had slightly messed up. She had a point that he wasn't treating his subject right in his soulmate's mind.

Comments really appreciated ❤️

[casspurrjoybell-25]

Cold as Ice - Chapter 36 - Part 1

*Warning Adult Content*

Wren Ridley

My fingers tapped on the steering wheel as I drove Robin back to the airport later that night.

It was like I couldn't get them to stop even if I tried.

I didn't have a handle on my mind and they had a mind of their own.

Robin and I were silent for a little while.

I had a audio-book playing, trying to lose my mind in anything other than my reality at the moment but Robin was a talker, so it didn't last long.

"This was a really fun few days. I'm kinda sad it's over," Robin said, glancing over at me.

I was glad it was enjoyable for one of us.

For me it was anything but.

It was like these short few days had completely derailed my life.

My relationship with Fox, my relationship with Landon, both were completely turned around.

For the first time in a long time, my life felt completely out of my control.

That was why I tended not to let others have a stake in my life. It made things too unpredictable.

"So is everything okay with you and Fox?" Robin asked after I didn't reply.

I scoffed.

"What do you think?"

Robin shot me an awkward smile like that was the exact answer he expected.

"He'll come around," he said.

"I don't think he will."

I knew if it ever came to this, Fox finding out, that it would end poorly.

He was never going to be okay with me being with Landon.

I never expected him to find out or for my relationship with Landon to last long enough for Fox to find out.

"He was bitching at me about you last night," Robin said.

"I told you it was bold to wear Landon's sweatshirt to the game."

I rolled my eyes.

"It's not like I expected to see him after the game. He shouldn't have been in the locker room."

He was the one that told me not to even go, so why would I plan on seeing him afterward?

"Look, I know you two like to be at each other's throats but I think maybe if Fox realized what Landon meant to you he'd be more understanding."

I shook my head and let out a sigh.

Robin clearly misunderstood my relationship with Fox entirely.

We didn't like being on each other's nerves, it was just how we were.

Fox didn't care if Landon meant something to me.

He saw my relationship with him as an act of betrayal.

It didn't matter how I felt.

"You don't know what Landon means to me," I told him.

Robin shot me a knowing look.

He was always so perceptive, one of the only people who could catch me in my lies.

"I wasn't born yesterday," he said.

"You don't have to tell me anything but I know this wouldn't be as big of a deal if you two were just friends."

I didn't say anything.

Robin could believe what he wanted to believe.

The two of us didn't say anything else until I pulled into the airport and pulled off to the side to let Robin out.

"Well, I'll see you in a few weeks," Robin said, pulling his bag from the backseat.

"Try to make up with Fox by Christmas, at least for Mom's sake. She hates when you two are fighting."

"Fly into Boston next time and take the train home," I said, no emotion in my tone.

I was done talking about Fox with him.

I was done talking at all.

The sooner he got out of my car so I could be by myself, the better.

Robin let out a sigh but smiled at me anyway.

"Bye, Wren. Love you."

I gave him a two finger wave and waited until he was in the building before pulling away.

I turned my audio-book back on, rewinding back to the last part I remembered but after a moment I had to stop it.

This was the book I was listening to with Landon and it felt weird to continue it without him, even if he didn't really care about it.

I paused the book and put another on.

It was like there were two different parts of my mind, one that was taking over and directing me wherever I was going and one that was just along for the ride.

I didn't know where I was headed.

I just drove around aimlessly for a while because there was nothing else for me to do.

I didn't know where Landon was or if he even wanted to see me.

Eventually I made it back to my dorm and sat at my desk with my laptop.

Maybe if I read a little bit of my draft, I could pull out of the writer's block I'd been facing lately.

It seemed like the more I read, the worse I felt.

I started to hate my writing, hate the story I created.

It felt too much like I was writing about my own life.

The main character felt too much like me and I started hating traits about him that I found present in myself.

I was sitting at my desk for a while, staring at my computer in irritation.

I was so lost in thought that I didn't even realize James had come into the room until he slammed his hand down on my desk.

"Hello," he said in an annoyed tone.

"Were you just going to ignore me?"

"What?"

I glanced at the time.

It was just after five.

James must have just gotten back from New York.

"I asked how your Thanksgiving was," he replied.

"And your time with your family this weekend? Did you really not even hear me?"

I sighed and shut my laptop, standing from my desk.

"No, I didn't hear you, clearly," I said.

I walked over to my closet and pulled Landon's sweatshirt out, throwing it on over my t-shirt.

"My Thanksgiving was fine. How was yours?"

Not that I really cared all that much but I was so out of it I just had to go through the motions.

"It was good, glad to be back though," James said.

He looked at me strangely when he saw me walking toward the door.

"Where are you going? You don't wanna go get dinner?"

"No, I gotta go," I said, patting my pockets to make sure I had my keys and wallet with me before I left.

I sent a text to Landon on my way down to the car.

To: Landon Reilly [Are you around?] From Wren Ridley

I didn't expect a response but I hoped for one anyway.

Landon hadn't been answering any of the texts I sent him.

I didn't even care about appearing desperate, I just wanted him to respond.

He wanted space after the game, I got that but it sort of felt like he wanted nothing to do with me anymore and that made me feel empty.

If he didn't want to see me at all anymore, I wished he'd just say it.

That way I wouldn't have to appear so desperate for his attention.

A response never came as I drove over to his dorm.

I didn't even know if he was here.

When I knocked on the door, Kyle answered with a look of confusion.

"Landon's not here," he said.

"Do you happen to know where he is?" I asked, shoving my hands in my pockets.

"No but shouldn't you?"

"Well, clearly I don't," I said with a grin, trying to hide the strain in my voice.

I didn't want it to seem like I snapped at him but it may have come across like that anyway.

"I haven't seen him since I got back," Kyle said.

"I figured he was with you."

'Not very helpful, Kyle.'

"Alright then," I replied, turning and walking out.

When I got back to my car, I just sat there for a few moments.

I didn't like this feeling of uncertainty.

I wasn't sure what was going on with Landon and me anymore or if he was angry with me or embarrassed.

It made me feel insecure and unimportant.

I wished he would talk to me.

I wished I knew what to do to make him want to talk to me.

I wanted the two of us to be able to stay in our own little bubble in Providence, not mixing our lives here with ours away from here.

Mixing the two just made things more complicated.

It made it so I couldn't keep my life at school separate from my family which also complicated things.

Fox clearly knew that what I had with Landon wasn't platonic but what did the rest of my family think?

Robin had a hunch, maybe my parents did too.

I had spent so long hiding my true self from all of them just for them to find out like this.

I didn't know what any of them were thinking, didn't know if I even wanted to.

I hated this feeling more than anything.

This was why I never let myself get close to anyone.

This was why letting my feelings reach deep within me for someone else wasn't a good idea.

It was never a good idea, I knew it, yet I let it happen anyway.

I let out a sigh as I looked at my cell-phone once more before leaning my head on the steering wheel.

Then I sat up and started the car.

All I could do was drive around, listening to an audiobook, to clear my mind.

[klove0511]

It's Rest I Want Chapter 4

“Just like that.”

The demon grinned, and Dean hated her. She had played on his one weakness, and she knew it. But hate or not, he couldn't be mad about it, not if it gave him Sam. 

He opened his mouth to accept the deal when cold washed over him. Suddenly he was a passenger in his own body, completely frozen in place while something else took control.

No, he thought, struggling to move, to speak, to do anything at all.

Sorry, Dean.

The words blindsided him. Sam was possessing him? He knew ghosts could if they were powerful enough, but he'd never expected this. For a moment, just the smallest moment, he was happy. Dean had spent his whole life protecting Sam, and more than once he'd wished Sam didn't have to exist separate from himself. It was out there that could hurt him. He'd once heard a mother lamenting giving birth because now her baby wasn't safe in her body, and he'd understood exactly how she felt. The moment faded as soon as he heard Sam speak. His little brother, his beautiful, intelligent, stubborn asshole of a brother, was telling the demon no. That he would rather stay dead. Dean howled in fury, throwing everything he had at Sam in a vain attempt to reclaim control. 

Then it was too late. The demon was gone and the summoning materials burned. Dean would have cried if he had control of his tear ducts. Since he didn't, he let his consciousness fall back into something like sleep.

He was alone in his body when he woke up in a strange motel room.

Sunlight filtered through the curtains, letting him see the ugly orange and olive décor. Some place still stuck in the 70s, then. There was a new bottle of whiskey on the table by the window, and next to it was a piece of paper folded in half. From the bed he could read his name, written in Sam's neat handwriting.

He crawled out of bed, reaching for the note.

Dean,

I’m sorry. I know you're pissed, and I get it. I shouldn't have done that to you. But please, you've got to understand, I couldn't let you make that deal. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if you went to Hell for me. Please try to understand. 

Please. Let me go.

Sam

With a snarl he crumpled the paper, throwing it across the room. Rage boiled up, needing to be released. He flipped the table, hardly caring that the whiskey bottle shattered when it landed. For the next few minutes he was barely aware of what he was doing, just needing to break whatever was closest to him. Needing to feel the pain in his hand when he punched the wall. 

By the time the fury was spent, the room was trashed. Dean sagged to the floor, drained of the anger that he'd been wearing like a shield these last few months. Fuck Sam. He— His breath hitched. He closed his eyes, fighting down the sobs that were threatening. Slowly he took one deep breath, then another. When he had a sliver of control he said, “You still here, Sam?”

Silence. He waited for a breeze or a cold spot. The room was as empty as it had been when he woke up. His restraint crumbled, and he mourned with deep, gasping sobs. He hated it. Hated that he couldn't stop, hated that even this didn't feel like enough. There was nothing he could do. Nothing to save Sam. Nothing to let this feeling out. 

He'd had one moment where he was as close to Sam as he could possibly be, and Sam had— Sam had used Dean's body to make sure they would never— It was impossible. Unthinkable. They'd never share another meal. Never fight over laundry day. Never bitch at each other over who cleaned the guns or wanted terrible snacks for movie night. He’d never again feel Sam’s hands on him while tending Dean’s wounds. He couldn't be. He. 

God, Dean had been an idiot. He'd thought he was doing ok, considering. He'd thought he was getting by, dealing with it. Yeah, ok, maybe he was drinking too much and barely eating or sleeping, but he'd been out there. He'd been hunting, and he hadn't even gotten himself killed yet. So, yeah. Considering the circumstances, he'd thought he was doing pretty good. He was a fucking idiot.

John was tucked into one of the back booths of the Roadhouse, nursing a beer while he pored over his research. Ash had told him to come, but he hadn’t specified why. He’d been passed out drunk in the trailer behind the bar when John had arrived two hours ago. Ellen had told John to just be patient. Ash didn’t live on the same schedule as the rest of the world.

When Ash did stagger into the main room, he was rumpled and hungover, which did nothing to deter him from starting his day with a beer. He was in another hideous sleeveless shirt, flannel this time, with the shoulders fraying where the sleeves had been cut off. At least this time he had a shirt on underneath it. “Yo, Papa Winchester! You made it!” he said by way of greeting.

John struggled not to glare. The man had proven his talents already, so it did John no favors to alienate him. “What have you got?”

Ash flopped into the seat across from him. “I,” he started dramatically, “have got a lead.”

John cocked his head expectantly.

Ash rolled his eyes and guzzled his beer. “Winchesters. No flair for theatrics.” He shook his head in disapproval. “Fine. All right, did Ellen catch you up?”

John grumbled low. “No. She didn’t. What is the lead.”

“Fine. Shit, dude. So, you know Dean has been working this case. Well, he managed to find out that the mothers—not always the moms, actually, but mostly them—all encountered our Yellow Eyed friend before the night of the fires.”

John thought of the list in his journal, names and dates where the demon had appeared prior to coming to their home. “What do you mean ‘encountered?’”

“I mean encountered. Ran into. Met. But I also mean made a deal with.”

John’s blood ran cold. “Mary wouldn’t.”

Ash winced and ran a hand through his mullet. “Sorry, my man. Unless you did, then it’s safe to say it was her.”

“What does that mean though? Made a deal for what?”

“That part ain’t real clear. This guy wasn’t making deals like a regular demon. Said he didn’t have any interest in their souls. Just wanted permission. But anyhow. That’s not the lead. All that did was give me more people to look for. It took some doing, mind, but I’ve found like a dozen of these people so far. And get this: most of ‘em have gone missing in the last month.”

Permission. He thought of the demon coming into their home, into Sammy’s nursery. Given what he knew of Azazel’s plans, this information just cemented his certainty that he’d made the right call letting Sam go.  He swallowed back bile. “You figure out where they’ve been going?”

Ash beamed at him. “Ding ding ding! Give the man a medal. Now, understand that I haven’t actually found these kids, right? But I have found demonic omens that line up with the patterns you’ve observed. It stands to reason that the missing people that this demon has previously targeted just might be in the place with all the demonic signs.”

The guy looked so damn proud of himself. John clenched his jaw, trying to keep his patience. “Ash. Where.”

John had just about finished planning his route when Dean came through the door. Dean hadn't looked good when John had last seen him, half-crazed researching for weeks while he tried to save Sam, but he was barely recognizable now. His son looked gaunt, like he hadn't remembered to stop for food enough since they'd parted ways. He was unshaven, unwashed, and the smell of booze reached John from fifty feet away. 

Ellen greeted Dean, who asked for Ash. Ash had disappeared into the back rooms again, doing whatever it was he did most of the time. It didn't take long for Dean to emerge from the back with a new look of determination. He was headed toward the bar when he caught sight of John, his eyes widening in surprise. His poker face was good though, and that was the only sign of recognition John saw. They watched each other a moment, John studying his son's changed appearance. He obviously wasn't sleeping enough either, judging from the dark circles under his eyes. It hurt, seeing Dean look so— He searched for an adequate word. So broken.

It reminded him of himself in those early days. Trying to care for two young boys while he grieved Mary, trying to process what he'd witnessed the night she died. He'd barely survived.

Learning about the supernatural from Missouri had been the only thing he could hold on to, a reason to keep going. His quest for revenge. Like Ellen had said, he did understand that. He just hadn't understood what she'd meant when she'd been talking about Dean, not until now, at least. He’d never suspected things between them had been like that.

Of course, he'd known the boys were close. He'd encouraged it their whole lives. They relied on each other, trusted each other. Sam had worked with Dean far better than he'd ever worked with John, and Dean had blossomed in the year the boys had hunted together without John commanding them. Seeing Dean now, John understood that he had done this to his son. That closeness, such a boon on a hunt where a good partner meant life or death, was only a source of pain. It was a wonder Dean hadn't gotten himself killed yet. 

Dean obviously wasn't going to make the first move, so John tilted his head in a “come here” gesture. Dean hesitated a moment more, then set his jaw and moved. He didn't say anything as he slid into the booth, didn't even look at John. 

John sighed and said, “You coming with me?”

Dean's face contorted, some subtle fight between pissed and darkly amused. But he said, “I'll meet you there, and I’ll call Bobby, have him join us. Don’t forget to bring the Colt.”

“Dean—”

“I'm not debating this with you.”

That hadn't been what he was going to do, but it didn't matter. Apologies could wait. 

Dean drove 20 over the speed limit the whole way, letting the roar of Baby's engine soothe him. Seeing John had been a surprise, and he'd have words with Ellen later about that. For now, he had to concentrate on not getting himself killed long enough to get his revenge. The demon, then John. Or John, then the demon? He saw advantages to both, but trying to play out each scenario made him feel hollow and numb. The anger was protecting him right now, and he needed that if he was going to stay functional long enough to get this done. Fuck planning. He'd play this by ear. 

The radio crackled, and he reached for it, intending to slot a tape in. He was going fast enough that it wasn't worth finding another radio station. Too soon he'd be out of range and have to try again. At least South Dakota wasn't far, relatively speaking. Another hour or two and he'd be there. Before he could get the tape in the player, he recognized the voice breaking through the static, and it wasn't the latest DJ. It was Sam.

Relief flooded him, followed closely by shame and more anger. It took him a minute to even recognize what Sam was trying to say. 

“Slow.... down....” 

Dean rolled his eyes and pressed harder on the gas. 

“Dean...” Sam sounded pissed, and Dean had no trouble imagining the bitch face Sam was shooting at him. He glanced at the passenger seat, a grin on his face before he remembered. 

He refocused on the road, glaring into the night. “Where have you been? I thought you might have moved on or something.”

“Tired.... Work....”

Dean tried to work that out. “Possession wears you out?”

“Yeah...”

“The things you learn.” The air was cooling rapidly, but he didn't slow down. “You doing ok, otherwise?”

It took longer for Sam to respond this time, and Dean wondered if it was because he was choosing his words or because talking like this was hard too. “…Worried...”

“What do you have to be worried about?” It came out incredulous and harsher than he intended, but things often did when he was angry.

“You.” Just one word, and the only one so far that had been crystal clear. Well then.

“You don't need to be worried about me. I'm fine.”

“Not...” The temperature dropped a couple more degrees, and Dean turned the heater up.

Sam wasn't wrong, and he wasn't the first to express concern. Ellen had said as much, and so had Bobby. The way John had looked at him had spoken volumes. Even Ash had said he looked like crap, which was more social than the guy normally was. “I'm fine enough.”

“Don't... kill... Dad...”

Dean furrowed his brow. “What? Why? How do you even know about that? I haven't told anyone.”

“Not... mad...”

“How the hell aren't you mad at him? Huh? He killed you. His own son.” 

“Already.... dead...”

Dean shook his head in denial. The road in front of him was blurring, and he had to let the car slow a little. No way was he dying in a car crash right before— before he finished things.

“Yes...” There was a longer pause, and then Sam's voice came through softer, pleading. “Please...”

“How can you ask me that?” He pulled in a shuddering breath. “You already— You want me to let you stay dead. Ok. Fine. I haven't summoned any demons, have I? But you weren't dead. Not yet. Not until he pulled the plug. So that's on him.”

“Dean...”

“I can't let him walk, Sam. I just can't. He's the one who taught us that family is everything. I don't— How can you be ok with this?”

“Not... ... fault...” Sam's voice was fading, and it sparked panic in Dean’s gut. He wasn’t ready to lose this again already. 

“Hey, now. Don't do that. Ok? Just. You don't have to talk.” He drummed his hands on the steering wheel. “It doesn't make any sense to me, is all. After the way we were raised. He loved you most, you know? And I knew it, and I never even was mad about it because I loved you most too. It was just how the world worked, as far as I could tell. Not saying I never got pissed at you. Hell, we both got pissed at you. But that didn't fucking matter. You were the one we were protecting.” He grimaced. “I always kind of wondered if it was because of Mom. She died protecting you, so we spent the next 23 years trying to do it too. So, to have him do what he did, just doesn't make sense to me. I’m sure he had his reasons.” Dean chewed his bottom lip. “But I trusted him to look after you the way I would, and I lost you. So screw him and his reasons.”

Dean drove in silence for a long time after that. Eventually the temperature in the car returned to normal, and the static faded to normal levels. He pushed the Metallica tape into the player but kept the volume low. Sam stayed quiet, though whether or not that was by choice Dean had no way to know. He didn't even know if Sam was still listening. Some time after he crossed the border into South Dakota, Dean said, “I won't kill him, if that's really what you want.”

The words hung in the air, and Dean regretted saying them. But then the radio crackled again, and Sam's voice clearly said, “Yes... Thank you.”

“I can't promise to forgive him. That's not— It's unforgivable.” 

Sam didn't respond again, so Dean took it for agreement. At the least, it seemed Sam didn't want (or didn't have the energy) to argue the point.

Bobby was the first to arrive. He met John at the end of the dirt road that led to the town. It had fallen into disrepair over the last several decades, and the surrounding forest had reclaimed it. They’d have to hike the rest of the way.

John thought back to that voicemail he still had saved and wondered if Bobby was going to follow through on his threat. Neither of them spoke, just nodded acknowledgement into the stony silence. Dean couldn’t be that far behind, and John felt the need to settle things with Bobby first. However Dean felt, he trusted his son to have his eye on the prize. He wouldn’t stab John in the back until the demon was dead. Bobby had no such motivation, and he’d made it perfectly clear that he thought he’d make a better father to John’s boys than John did.

Eyeing Bobby’s shotgun carefully, he was prepared to dodge out of the way at a moment’s notice. “Bobby.”

Bobby grunted in response.

It wasn’t fear that had settled in John’s belly. Resignation, maybe. Low level grief that had nothing to do with Sam or Mary’s loss. He and Bobby had been good friends, once. It had been years since that was true, but the man had put their differences aside not that long ago. John didn’t expect him to be able to do it again.

He opted for blunt honesty. In truth, he didn’t know another way. “How worried do I need to be about you using that on me?” John asked.

Bobby clenched his jaw and gripped the gun a little tighter. “I’m here to make sure Dean don’t end up like his brother. That’s all.” Don’t risk Dean, and you have nothing to worry about went unsaid.

That was fair enough, he supposed. It was good, even, because if Bobby was watching Dean’s back then John could focus on making sure Azazel got put in the ground. He wouldn’t have to split his attention. 

Dean arrived in Cold Oak, South Dakota just before midnight. Bobby hiked ahead, acting as scout. Dean privately thought it was just to get away from John for a while. The tension between the two of them had been palpable when he arrived. 

John broke the silence after only a minute or two. “Are you ready for this?”

“What's that supposed to mean?” Dean said. He was tired and pissed off. Sam had to be somewhere close, and Dean didn't particularly want to think about how it would go if John found out about that. Besides, he hadn't had enough sleep in the last four months. At this point he figured he was allowed to be a little crabby.

“Just making sure your head's in the game.” 

Dean side-eyed his father. “Of course it is. We've been preparing for this fight my whole life. I'm not about to fuck it up now.”

“Good.”

“Good.” Dean let that be it for maybe a minute, but he couldn't stop his mind from thinking about it. “Why do you think my head isn't in the game?”

John shrugged minutely, barely visible in the moonlight. “You look like shit, Dean. It's obvious you haven't been taking care of yourself lately. I don't know how far that goes.”

“Why do you care?” 

John faltered a step, turning to actually look at Dean. “Because I'm your father.”

That was the last thing he should have said. Fury boiled up past all of Dean's exhaustion, and he struggled to remember that an hour ago he'd promised Sam not to murder John. “You're my father? Is that like how you were Sam's father when you told me to let him die? Or how about when you gave me a fake spell that was supposed to heal him? Or were you his father when you took him off life support? God, with parenting like that, who needs monsters?” 

John stilled. The tension in the air was palpable. “Sam was already dead, Dean.”

“No. He wasn't. That's the whole point of life support. There was time to save him. What's the point of knowing about all this shit if Sam was going to die anyway?” He shook his head and started forward. 

To his credit, John didn't raise his voice. If it had been Sam arguing with him, it probably would have already devolved into a shouting match. “It's not our place to mess with the natural order. That's part of what we do.”

Dean groaned and turned to face John. “Right. The natural order. Like you would’ve made the same choice if it was Mom.”

“Don’t bring your mother into this,” John growled.

Dean stepped up into John’s space. “Am I wrong? You let Sam die because of the demon and its fucking plans, and you’re too much of a coward to admit you were scared of your own son.” Dean snarled. “Did you know Mom made a deal with the thing?”

John ignored the distraction. “I wasn't scared of your brother; I was scared for him! The demon was going to use him.”

“How? Have you even met Sam? He's not an idiot. No way he'd let a demon use him to fight a war.”

Sam's voice rippled out of the darkness to Dean's left. “If you wanted Dean to listen to you, why didn't you just tell him what you learned? You didn't have a problem telling me. Except, oh right, I was in a coma.” Sam chuckled, dark anger lacing his voice.

John's expression was a mix of horror and grief. “Sam? What are you— Damn it, Dean, what the hell did you do? Didn't I teach you better than this?”

“Fuck you. I gave him a hunter’s funeral.”

“And it didn't concern you that he's a ghost anyway?”

Sam rolled his eyes and threw his arms wide. “What, you want him to burn the Impala? After giving him crap about it needing a wash? Give him a break.”

“I don't need you to defend me, Sam.” John and Sam fighting raised his peacekeeper instincts. He wanted to grab Sam's shoulder and push him back, to physically insert himself between the two of them. Only it wouldn't have worked anyway. Doing that had only ever made them shout louder.

John ignored Dean's statement completely. “Yes, if that's what it takes. What's dead should stay dead. You both know that.”

Sam snarled and reached for John, throwing him against a tree. He moved to follow John's trajectory, luckily not stutter stopping forward like most ghosts, and Dean scrambled to get in front of him. 

“Woah, dude, chill out. What happened to not holding a grudge?” He was still livid, furious with John, but Sam needed him to be a voice of reason. Throwing people was serious vengeful spirit territory, and they needed to get a lid on this, right now.

Sam stopped moving, but he was still seething. “Why do you let him say shit like that? You—”

Sam didn't get to finish his sentence because a demon interrupted them. It was shaped like a little girl but sported long, wicked looking claws. Dean blasted it with rock salt, and it vanished into smoke. “Come on, we need to move. It knows we're here,” Dean said, helping John to his feet. “We must be close.” John looked a little dazed, but he moved ok. Dean hoped Sam hadn't managed to do too much damage.

Bobby broke through the trees then, out of breath and wild-eyed. “The Hell are you idiots doing back here?”

Dean filled him in tersely, and Bobby led all of them the last few yards to the town. Sure enough they had been close, and they broke through the woods into the town after just another 100 yards. The place looked empty, but it didn't feel empty. Standing by the tree line was enough to make Dean's hair stand on end. The buildings were in various states of disrepair. Some seemed largely intact, just a broken window or two. Others, like the house nearest them, had entire walls that had caved in, the wood rotting with time and neglect. 

“Cheery place,” Dean murmured. 

John glared at him, then motioned for them to split up and search the town. Dean silently groaned, rolling his eyes. They'd all been shouting at each other not ten minutes ago, and the Acheri demon suggested they'd already lost their element of surprise. John took the right while Bobby moved toward the center of town. Dean moved to the left, toward the collapsing house. A breath of wind on his neck made him look, and Sam was there, following. 

“It's creepy when you do that,” he said.

“Do what?”

“Spooky ghost shit.” They moved cautiously. Well. Dean moved cautiously, and Sam moved silently. He had the same posture as Dean, though it probably didn't matter.

“Sorry I can't do creepy werewolf shit instead,” he deadpanned. “This place sucks. Seriously, why do you let him talk to you like that?”

Dean ignored the question. He hadn’t been letting John do anything. They walked in silence a few minutes while they searched the small town. “Does it hurt?”

Sam frowned, confused. “Does what hurt?”

Dean clenched his jaw a couple times before he managed to bite out, “Dying.”

The question surprised Sam, and he stopped walking while he considered his answer. The longer he took, the more certain Dean was that whatever he said was going to be a sanitized lie. 

“If you mean after the spell, then no. I got kicked out of my body in the first couple hours after the crash, I think, and I didn’t feel anything after that.”

Dean swallowed thickly. “Good. That’s good.” The way Sam had phrased it, though. “You remember the accident?”

Sam chewed the side of his lip. “Yeah. You and Dad were knocked out, but I wasn’t. It was a demon possessing the truck driver.” Sam breathed a laugh. “I threatened it with the Colt. God. Dad really would have killed me if I’d used the last bullet on Stunt Demon #5.”

“I thought you weren’t pissed at him.”

Sam rubbed the back of his head. “Yeah. Uh. I don’t know. I’m not. Not like you are.”

“So what the hell was that back there, huh? Throwing people?” Dean cleared the next building. Nothing there but some battered and rotting furniture. They turned toward the center of town.

Sam didn’t answer. “Dude, are you seeing all these ghosts?”

“Most haunted town in America, or so the stories say. You can see them?”

“You can't? This place is full of spirits.” Sam grimaced and sidestepped an invisible object. Dean gave him an “Oh really?” look, and Sam elaborated. “I think— Most of them look old, but pretty normal. Like they just got sick or something. But some of them died bloody.”

“How can you tell?” He glanced at Sam, body restored in his spirit form.

Sam shrugged, stopping to study one. Dean wished it didn't look like thin air to him. “Some of them don't fit.”

“Don't fit how? Come on, Sam, stop being cryptic.” 

“They're newer. Younger looking.”

Dean shifted, keeping an eye out for threats he could actually see. “So people have been coming here for years because of the stories. Some of them had to have been killed.”

“Well, yeah, some. That guy over there in the bell bottoms probably died back in the 70s. But her—” Sam pointed off to his right, toward the tavern where John had gone. “She looks modern. I mean, her clothes, but not just that. She looks,” he paused searching for the right word, “I don't know, fresher somehow. I can't really explain it.”

That seemed important and really fucking ominous. The demon was supposed to be here somewhere, though they couldn't figure out why. Ash had started finding other likely psychic kids somehow (the dude worked magic, seriously), and there'd been a half dozen so far that also had missing persons reports. If they had also been showing up here, and at least one was a ghost, then... Dean tried to fit the pieces together. He couldn't yet, but the picture that was forming was grim. He found himself half-grateful that Sam was already dead. He couldn't imagine what he'd do if Sam went missing and turned up here. Worse, if Dean found him too late. He shuddered, then pushed the thought from his mind.

While he'd been thinking, Sam had vanished. “Sam?” he called. “Come on, man, don't wander off.” Dean glanced around anxiously, wondering where his brother had gone. He had to keep moving, though. Sam would have to take care of himself.

Dean had cleared two buildings by the time Sam reappeared, blinking into the periphery of Dean's vision and making him jump. “Don't do that,” he barked. “I almost shot you.”

“It's just rock salt,” Sam said, brushing it off.

“And you're just a ghost, remember?”

Sam considered that a moment, then seemed to remember why he'd come back. “Dude, you need to find Dad and Bobby.  One of the psychics is killing the others.”

Dean looked at him sharply. “It's not the demon?”

“No. Some girl is controlling the demons guarding the town. The ghost I talked to said this is some sort of Battle Royale, fight to the death sort of thing. Only the winner doesn't get to leave.”

Dean furrowed his brow. “That's messed up. Did he know why?”

“She didn't. But it sounds like there's a new 'round' every few weeks, so maybe it just isn't over.” The two of them started heading in the direction John had gone.

“That's a comforting thought. So the girl killing people, how long has she been here?”

“No idea. Sounds like she's won at least a few rounds though. Look, over there.” They could hear someone talking in the distance, and as Dean rounded the corner, he spotted John talking to a group of young adults who all looked around Sam's age. 

Dean clenched his jaw. “That must be the newest crop. Lucky we got here before she picked them all off.” Drawing closer, he called out, “Dad!”

John looked over at Dean, then turned back to the group of kids he’d found. They’d all told him similar stories about blacking out and waking up in the ghost town. None of them seemed to know why they were there, but they’d just arrived earlier that day. “I’ll be right back,” he said. “Stay put.”

Jogging over to Dean, he asked, “What?”

Dean filled him in on the supposed killer amongst them.

John was skeptical. Ghosts weren’t a reliable source of information. Their perspectives were always skewed; they saw what they wanted to see. It was part of what made them dangerous. “Even if that’s true, it’s not one of those kids. All their stories match.”

Dean pursed his lips, but he didn’t protest. Together they walked back to the group, and John introduced him to Tony, Ava, Leah, Vaughn, and Mark. All the kids were about Sam’s age, but they were otherwise a pretty diverse crowd. Mark looked like he would have been more at home on the beaches of California, toned and solid and definitely not dressed for a South Dakota winter, while Vaughn was taller than all of them and beanpole thin, though in the dim light of his flashlight John couldn’t tell if the boy was also wiry like Sam had been for a while after his last growth spurts. Tony’s dark skin highlighted the whites of his eyes, and it made him look more scared than the others, and his glasses and chubby build spoke of a more sedate life than the other guys. Maybe he’d be more at home in a library than a haunted town. Ava and Leah stuck together, though he didn’t have the impression that they had known each other before today. Then again, they were both slim and of medium height, and they looked similar enough that they could have been sisters. 

Ignoring the guys, Dean plastered on his best cocky grin and said, “Hello, ladies.”

John murmured at him, “Keep it in your pants, boy.”

Ava ducked her head, flattered. Leah just shifted uncomfortably. 

“Have either of you seen anything? Any idea what might have brought you here?” Dean had turned the charm up to 11. It had been long enough since they’d worked together that John had forgotten that Dean sometimes did this, used his sex appeal like a girl, charming witnesses and victims into spilling their secrets. He was good at it, too. 

The temperature was continuing to drop, though, and they needed to get everyone inside. “All right, everyone,” John said, voice pitched to carry over the wind that had just picked up. “There’s a tavern over there that’s still in decent shape. Let’s get there, get inside. Dean, you see if you can find anything useful.” He shot Dean a look to communicate that by ‘useful’ he meant ‘weapons.’ With luck, he’d also find Bobby and fill him in.

Dean nodded and trotted off the way he’d come, leaving John to babysit five young adults. He herded them toward the intact building he’d seen, not trying to make small talk. There was always the chance that they would let something slip when they thought he wasn’t listening, and it was a good chance to observe them. If Dean and Sam turned out to be right, then they needed to figure out who was killing the kids. His money was still on the demon, or at least a demon. Azazel was supposed to be here, but the signs could have been wrong. He had the guys work on barricading the door while he checked the windows. 

“Everyone, stay close,” he said.

Ava hugged herself tighter. “Who are you guys? Did you bring us here?”

He glanced at her sharply. “We’re hunting the thing that did.” 

“Thing?” Tony chimed in. “What the hell does that mean?”

He’d hoped to get out of this without giving them all the Talk. The less they knew about the supernatural the better. No one needed a bunch of kids deciding they wanted to be hunters and getting themselves killed for it. All five of them were approaching him now, arranged in a semi-circle, and he sighed, resigned to it. The version he gave was abridged, limited to ghosts and demons. 

“You’re insane,” Leah said, backing away. “You and that other guy are going to kill us, aren’t you?”

“None of you are dying tonight,” John said. “Dean is looking for salt and anything else we can use against this thing. We didn’t expect to find all of you here.”

She was shaking her head though, refusing to believe him. When she bolted for the door she was already well out of reach. He could chase her, but that would mean abandoning the other four. He swore but let her go.

“I’ll go after her,” Ava said. 

“No!” Mark whisper-shouted. “What if the thing finds you? We’re safer here.”

Vaughn raised an eyebrow at him. “You actually believe this? No way is this guy telling the truth. I’ll go with you, Ava. Stay here if you want, man.”

“At least it’s warmer in here! I’m going to freeze to death in that wind.” Mark rubbed at his arms and grumbled in frustration. “Fine. Do what you want. Try not to get killed.”

“All of you should stay inside,” John said. “It’s safer as a group.” 

Ava and Vaughn ignored him and left through the only door. He growled, but let them go. When Dean got back with supplies one of them could chase after the others. In the meantime, he’d make sure this place was boarded up as tight as he could make it. 

Leah came back on her own a minute later, complaining of the cold. “Sorry. It’s just—” She shrugged. He understood. She wasn’t taking back her words, but she was at least allowing the possibility that something was happening to her that she couldn’t explain. He figured she’d come around to ghosts and demons if and when any of them showed up. 

Any of them, like Sam. How could Dean have fucked that up? Sam was supposed to be at peace. He was supposed to be gone, far beyond Azazel’s reach. John didn’t know if he believed in Heaven, exactly, but he wanted to. If Hell was real, then why not the other place? If it was real, then that’s where Sam should be. Not here in this ghost-filled wasteland. Definitely not in the one place where Azazel would be. 

That was going to have to be Dean’s problem, though, because the demon from the woods was back. It appeared just behind Leah, and John had enough time to shove her roughly to the side before its claws stabbed out. It caught him square in the stomach, going right through the space she had occupied a moment before. Grunting, he aimed his shotgun and blasted the demon. It dissipated in a cloud of smoke with a shriek. 

“Oh my God!” Leah crouched near him. Her eyes were wide, but she exuded competence as she pressed her hands to his wound. “Sorry. It’s too cold to lose a shirt. Everything’s filthy anyway.”

“Doctor?” he mumbled. The tingling in his fingers felt like blood loss more than hypothermia.

She shook her head and pressed harder. “ER nurse. I could probably get you stabilized if we weren’t in the middle of fucking nowhere with fucking demons. How is this real? I mean, I must be hallucinating. Except you’re really bleeding and that thing really attacked us.”

He felt lethargy pulling at him. “Hey. Tell Dean. Tell him—” He couldn’t get the words out; his throat wasn’t working right. Neither was his head, really. Everything was getting fuzzy, and there was a ringing in his ears. Just over Leah’s shoulder he thought he saw Sam flicker into view. Next to him was a stranger. Well. Damn it.

[overnightheartbeats]

"He just takes time to open up," she said softly, half-answering her question and half-falling back into their memories. Thinking back to the first time they spoke, how quiet he was then. How much she talked and, as she joked, eventually wore him down. "Sense of humor is a big one, he is hilarious. You'll see. I think he is opening up to you guys. Knew Aaron being perfect was too good to be true, he had something. His sock thing qualifies. That laugh is pretty good, but there's been times that he laughs so hard and he's like..almost bending over the table. And even if you weren't laughing as hard, you can't help but join in, and then your stomach hurts. The whole thing."

Laurel looked over at Julia, another small smile on her lips before letting out a sigh. She brought a good idea forward, combining their heads. They did work really well as a team. Easier said than done, but she'd need to do it. She needed to be at 100% capacity for him. A hum followed, realizing she hadn't really mentioned much of Isaac to Julia. After all, he wasn't really her friend. "I'm..yeah, I'll reach him. Eli gave me his number." There was a brief pause, knowing it'd sound ridiculous. "Believe it or not, he's an agent too. Stationed elsewhere though, I haven't really met him yet"

The necklace felt heavy in her hand. It was beautiful, and it was something she had wanted for so long, but now it felt wrong to even be holding. She didn't deserve this, definitely did not deserve to wear it. "I guess I did, it's that necklace I had sent you a picture of, from the mall. I told you I'd buy it eventually, maybe like an early holiday gift to myself. Looks like he beat me to it." She set it back down on the desk, along with his note.

—

Fighting sleep was easier said than done. One bath later, and back in his sweater, she felt her eyelids get heavier. When her head hit his pillow, she caught that faint scent of his cologne, and it was not anywhere near the comfort his hugs brought, but it was enough to lull her to sleep after the day she had. Dreams were filled with him, each part of her willing him home, as if he could listen to her. She just had so much to say to him, starting with I love you and ending with please forgive me. Sleep was only good for a few hours, jolting herself awake before the sun rose. Laurel wasted no time, her first call being to the hospital. She'd be there soon enough, but she needed to know how he was doing first thing in the morning. Though, the last thing Laurel expected was for them to keep the call brief saying they couldn't provide those details to her. Next call only had a nurse tell her, there's no update, sorry. It was infuriating. It didn't take her long to change out of her pajamas and his sweater, grabbing her badge and keys. Part of her yearned for that familiar fabric, but that sweater would be safer here at home.

Reaching the familiar hallway from last night, she stopped the first nurse in her path. Once again, asking the same questions, feeling like a broken record with the same song 'Eli.' But, they were refusing her. It felt different. They had kept information brief yesterday, but overnight, this had gone from bits and pieces to nothing. "Can you just tell me if he's okay? And if it's possible to see him? Just for a few minutes, I promise." Another no. Frustrated, she walked away from the nurses' station to text Julia. She had stepped out before they woke up, it was only fair she updated them. While texting in the back of the waiting room, she caught the familiar FBI jacket, but thought nothing of it. Probably another agent injury. It wasn't until she heard Eli's name that her head shot up. What was going on here? Like night and day, she saw the nurses quickly typing away on the computer, another handing a variety of papers and a pen to the man standing there. Were they giving him information? What the actual fuck? Was he a superior? When the man stepped back with a clipboard in hand, she approached the station once more to confront the latest pain in her ass. The nurses. What was this, bat your eyelashes and flash your badge and that's it? It was bullshit, completely unfair. "You'll give him information and not me? We're both agents, you know. I deserve to know what's going on with him."

"He's just so different, not in a bad way but he keeps to himself when he's around at parties that seeing he's got such a loud personality room wise just makes me laugh. You can see his sense of humor on these walls. I'm guessing it's what attracted you to him?" Julia chuckled and nodded her head. "It's endearing when it's not infuriating." Seeing the reaction from her best friend she knew staying on the lighter side of the Eli topic was helping. "You've mentioned you love his laugh. The one he lets out when he's thoroughly amused." She'd heard him chuckle, somewhat giggle at times but never had she experienced that laugh laurel had come to describe as his best one.

She sighed knowing this won't be easy to convince her that he had nothing to forgive. Laurel didn't do anything wrong. It was really going to take Eli waking up and telling her this himself for her to believe it. "Then combine both your heads. Look around the room. There's so much inspiration. So much of him in here. Use all your senses to get yourself together. You can say you can't do it without him then pool what you know he'd do without a doubt with what you'd do and use that as an energy force field. No thanking necessary. I'm happy to do it. Hopefully you'll be able to reach Issac. If he isn't out there doing, what does he do?"

Julia looked at her get up and sat cross legged on the bed. Waiting for a reply to whatever that shiny item was. The way she moved and carefully picked the note up she knew it was something from him. No one made her smile like that except Eli. "Movie marathons? You'll get back to it soon enough. I know it." She smiled just to give some reassurance. "Maybe you told him in passing?"

—

Back at the hospital the nurse staff had just made their rounds in Eli's room. Still noticing there was no change to update his emergency contact. It was suffice to say that they were on their way. Closing the door to his room, that left two lights on for the asleep patient. Eyelids were pattering as he tried to wake himself up and will himself to move. Move at least one finger to show that he hated trying to see in the dark. But so far no luck. His mind did go back to Laurel. Their bed and how she'd hog the blankets. He'd give anything to get back there. To her.

[lynderman]

𝙂𝙡𝙞𝙢𝙥𝙨𝙚 𝙊𝙛 𝙐𝙨 (Robin Arellano) Final Part

Pairing: Robin Arellano x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 1,955

Date Published: 8/9/22

Tags: Angst, AU, Alternate Universe, Heartbreak, breakups, (past) fluff, eventual Vance Hopper X Reader, time-skips, flashbacks, confessions, fighting.

Description: (This AU Has no grabber what so ever. It's just with the characters. I'm also making them all 16-17 just because it seems better to me lol.)

You and Robin had been dating for quite a while. It all went downhill When he began to get into fights again. A bit later, you get with someone else. How will Robin handle seeing you with someone who isn't him?

Full Chapterlist

(taglist)

@jackie-xoxo

@jadearellano

@wowwontonsoup

@liissharks

@kennedy4262

✯¸.•´*¨`*•✿ ✿•*`¨*`•.¸✯

𝘏𝘰𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥

As you locked the car door you shivered slightly. You had been in such a rush that you didn't bring a jacket. The dock looked abandoned as usual, other than a small group of other teens on the other side skinny dipping. It wasn't unusual, you just hoped that whoever wanted to meet you here wasn't wanting to participate In that. You made your way down the old dock. At the end, there was an old wooden bench. Wiping the dust off of it, you took a seat and looked around the lake. There wasn't anyone right by you. You enjoyed the peace and quiet.

You soon heard the crunch of leaves behind you, followed by footsteps on the old wood. You turned to your right, expecting to see Vance. It wasn't Vance. It was Robin. He looked the same as usual. You did notice that he was wearing a different belt buckle. You were a bit confused to see that it was the one you got him months ago. "Can I sit here?" You mumbled a yes. It was quiet for a while. Not awkward, just tense. As if you both didn't want to talk. "So you left the note in my locker?" You asked. "Yeah. I did." You slumped a little. "Do you want someone else here?" He turned to face you. "No no. It's not that. I just thought that it was Vance who left it." He gave you a sad look.

"Did he forget it was your birthday?" You didn't want to say yes. "That little prick." His tone of voice changed as he began to tap his knee. "He doesn't deserve you." You looked at Robin with more confusion. "He treats you like absolute shit. He ditches you for other people, yells at you constantly, and is borderline abusive. You don't deserve to be treated like that at all." You just sat there. "That's the same thing he said about you." He stopped tapping his knee. "That night at the roller rink. After we left he kept telling me about how 'He doesn't want to see me hurt again' and how 'I deserve so much better." It was complete bullshit. I wanted to stay back and talk with you. But of course he had to start a fight. I contemplated not going with him and just staying with you but-" You stopped when you processed what you were saying. You just outted your feelings to Robin again. You were still with Vance and he was still with Paige. Why did he come here anyways?

Robin held out his hand, signaling for you to open yours. He then handed you the other half of the bandana from the roller rink. "I fixed it for you. I sewed the rips. That way you don't have to keep the other half in your pocket all day. Maybe you can sew it back together." You couldn't help but blush. How did he know you always kept it in your pocket? It never went In our out unless you were in your room. "Look (y/n)." Robin scooted closer to you, turning his body to face you fully.

"Before Vance interrupted at the rink, I was going to say I'm sorry." You couldn't look at him. You couldn't bring yourself to do it. He sighed before going into greater detail.

"I'm sorry that I broke up with you. Especially the way it went down. Words cannot express how sorry I am. I never wanted to break up with you. I never wanted to go back to Paige. Everything she said was a lie. I never went to go see her. My Abuela was really sick. Or to say all those things about you. None of them were true. I was just so angry at myself. I took it out on you for no reason either. I shouldn't have let it get to the point where you were crying. And I'm sorry I forgot out anniversary. That was a dick move of me. I know that made all of it worse. And I'm sorry that I got into so many fights. I thought it would make me look better. That winning all of them would show how strong and confident I was. I just wanted to impress you was all. And I realize now it wasn't the correct way to do it. I got a bit jealous over the fact that Vance was hanging out with you more. You just make me feel something I can't explain. I don't know how to put it into words. You make me nervous, but I also get really happy. I Get all fidgety and talkative. Every time I see you and you smile at me it makes me feel like I got hit in the face. But in a good way. You're really pretty too. It's really hard to look away from you sometimes. And I care about you so much. You mean more to me than anyone in this world. And I don't wanna hurt you. But I know I did hurt you. With everything I've said and done. I didn't want to lose you either. But I did that too. I don't want to lose you again. It was wrong of me to compare you to Paige. The only reason I got back with was because I was lonely. I don't feel anything for her. Every thing we did, every hug she gave me, anything. I pretended it was you. I tried so hard to get over you. But I can't. You've shown me more love and affection than anyone else ever has. And that's why I care about you a lot. I want to protect you. I want you to be be happy. Every time I saw you cry it made me want to cry. I just want you to feel the same about me. I just want you to lo-"

"Love you?"

Robin froze. He was now standing up and in some over exaggerated pose. He always moves when he talks so it wasn't a surprise. When you met his eyes you could tell he was trying his hardest to hold back tears. "Yes. I want you to love me. When you told me on the hill, it hit me like a brick. That you did love me. That you felt the same way I feel now. And I didn't notice that. And I fucked up and then you got with Vance. But he's also-" Robin stopped speaking when you pressed your lips to his. He stood there in shock. When you stepped back you looked at him again, you could see he was crying.

"I'm sorry too Robin. For saying everything I said. And comparing you to Vance. I shouldn't have said any of that either. I did the same thing. I just Imagined Vance was you the entire time. It didn't do anything. All those fights you got into? I had to walk away so I wouldn't beat the shit out of the other person for hitting you. Or so I didn't come up to make sure you weren't hurt too badly. But I do love you robin. Even after we broke up. I never moved on. I couldn't. I still can't. I stay up every night waiting for you to climb through my window still."

He walked over and pulled you into his arms. He stood there as he laid his head on top of yours. You stood there, savoring the moment. This is what you'd been waiting for. For months, you waited to feel this type of love. "I accept your apology." You say into his chest. You can feel him laugh. "I accept yours too." After what seemed like minuets the two of you untangled. "So, what are we now?" You couldn't help but laugh as Robin asked. "Back together. Well, I mean if you want to be. Of course if you-"

"I'd love to be, "Mi corazón." A large smile was plastered on your face with his answer. The two of you walked from the dock and back to the parking lot. As you did so, you heard someone calling your name. you turned to see Vance walking angrily towards you both. When he reached you he began shouting. "What the hell is this?! Why are you with him?" He screamed. "Why were you with Paige earlier?" Vance went silent. On cue, again. Paige walked up behind him, calling his name.

"Robbie, why are you with her?" She sneered. "Don't call me that. And because we're dating again." Her jaw dropped. "Vance, I'm breaking up with you." He looked over to you. "You can't-" "Yes. I can. And I did." You grabbed Robin's Hand and began to walk off. You paused for a moment before shouting back to Paige. "He has AIDS by the way! From all the other girls he's been with!" The two of you watched and cackled as they fought.

"So you didn't drive here?" Robin shook his head. "So you walked." He nodded. At least you had a car now. He complimented it when you two made It to the parking lot. He walked over to get in but stopped when he saw you standing there. "Do you mind-" "Just hand me the keys." You smiled as you handed him your car keys and got in the passengers side. On the car ride back to your house, you both had the windows rolled down and the radio blasting Pink Floyd.

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

You mom still wasn't home. So you decided to let Robin sneak in. It wasn't exactly sneaking in if he went through the open front door. The two of you sat at the dining table eating your cake for a while before you decided to go to your room. When he walked in he smiled proudly. "Glad to see nothing's changed." He walked over to your record collection and began to peek through. The two of you sat on the bed playing your guitar for a while. That turned into a talk about school drama. Then that turned into something about animals. "Before I forget..." Robin begins to dig in his pocket. He pulls out. a small bag. Inside is an obsidian necklace. It has a locket at the end. Inside is a photo of the two of you on your first date. You smile and kiss his cheek. "I love it."

"You still kept it?" You set your necklace down and looked over to see Robin holding your cow. "Oh-yeah."

"I'd kinda hug it everynight since you weren't here." You laid on your back and looked up to the ceiling. "Well now I am." You felt his arm wrap around your waist, and pull you into his chest. The two of you stayed like this as you felt yourself grow sleepier. You turned over to look at him as your eyes began to droop. "Goodnight Robin."

"Goodnight (Y/n)."

︵‿︵‿︵‿︵‿︵

You bolted up right in bed. You were struggling to breathe for a moment as you sweat heavily and tears were pouring down your face. You aggressively felt around the bed for another person as you struggled to see in the dark. You didn't stop until someone grabbed your hand. Robin slowly sat up next to you and turned the light on. "(Y/n)..what's wrong? Why are you-" He heard you sniffle before you hugged him tightly. "What'd you dream about?" You explained the dream in vivid detail. You couldn't hold back your sobs. When you finished Robin cupped his face in your hands. "That'll never happen. (Y/n) you know I care about you too much to do that." He reassured you for a while until you calmed down enough. When you laid back down he placed a kiss on your forehead. "I love you Mi corazón." You smiled as you closed your eyes. "I love you too Robin."

The sound of rain hitting your window was even more comforting than usual tonight.

𝘈 𝘨𝘭𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘴𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘶𝘴

✯¸.•´*¨`*•✿ ✿•*`¨*`•.¸✯

Fin.

[under-sedationnn]

the arcana: main six reacting to injured! reader

anonymous: Could u do m6 reacting to mc coming home injured? I want some hurt/comfort >:))

Warnings: talk of being injured, blood. if that bothers you or tiggers you in anyway, please scroll away! i want this to be a safe place, only :)

thanks for the request anon!! i hope you enjoy!! <3 requests for the kissing prompts and physical affection prompts are STILL OPEN. please send them in with the character of your choice (which could be any character from any series i write for) and i will create an imagine!! thanks and happy reading!!

- tries his very very best to stay calm

- you can see panic bubbling under the surface

- faust is on high alert

- slithers around your shoulders and squeezes you for a hug

- "friend! hurt!"

- doesn't immediately ask what happened, just gets you to a comfortable place to be cleaned up

- then, and only then, will he brave to ask what happened to you

- or who did this to you

- wipes the blood from your skin with very gentle swipes

- winces when you wince, and apologizes profoundly

- "Y/n, how did this happen? i thought you were just taking a quick trip to the market."

- "i fell in the market, tripped over a stone"

- "and nobody helped you?"

- in this case he's disappointed with the bystanders, but does not become angry

- in a situation where someone hurt you?

- oh god

- "Y/n, how did this happen? i thought you were just taking a quick trip to the market."

- "yeah, well, somebody had their eye on the same apple i picked up. somehow, though, they managed to push me to the ground and steal it from my hands."

- i don't even think he would know what to say

- and asra is not really the type to march out into the streets of vesuvia and seek to challenge the one who hurt you

- but he would certainly hold a grudge against whoever it was if he did find out

- and would feel absolutely awful about letting you get hurt

- his mind would race about the possibility of losing you again

- because he simply can't handle it

- and what if that person had been particularly violent or malicious? what if you had been taken??

- you'd have to comfort the hell out of him to make sure he knows that you're okay

- "asra, hey, i'm fine! i can handle myself, you know that"

- "you're right, and i know you're right. it's just hard"

- "it's still hard for me, too. the market still makes me a little nervous and i got caught a little off guard, is all"

- that would make him feel better

- would finish patching up your wounds and would make sure to bring you to julian the next day if they were too bad for him to fix or needed stitches

- would also create a special brew to help with the pain and ease you to sleep

- "why don't i go down to the market tomorrow?"

- "why? so when you pick a fight over apples, i can pay you back for all of this high quality medical treatment?"

- "well of course, surely you didn't expect all this tender love and care to be free" *wink*

- panicked doctor mode enabled

- immediately begins checking you over, asking questions

- something tells me it would be a head injury of some sort

- "oh darling, what happe- you're bleeding!"

- "julian, i'm okay! it's just a little scratch"

- "no no no you might need stitches, come sit down. i'll go get my kit!"

- there's really no use in arguing

- he has cold ass hands, so he tries to warm them up before he begins suturing the wound

- tries to be gentle, and his expert hands move quickly without any snagging

- "so, how did this happen?"

- his voice is literally trembling

- "well, i was in the clinic grabbing the list of ingredients we need for our next grocery trip and there was a puddle of... something on the floor. i slipped and hit my head on the corner of your desk"

- immediately thinks it's his fault

- like "oh shit i should have cleaned better that could have killed y/n and then what would i have done-"

- doesn't necessarily voice this, but you can tell by the silence that follows that he's feeling really guilty

- would kneel for you, head on your knees

- "y/n, i am so sorry"

- "juli, it's really okay, i should have watched where i was going"

- "i'll make sure to clean better from now on, okay?"

- would guard you throughout the night in case of concussion

- nurse juli <3

- but let's say someone had put their hands on you

- would patch you up the same way, and apologize profusely for not being there with you

- tuck you into bed and fetch mazelinka to keep an eye on you throughout the night incase of a concussion

- would most definitely be self destructive and seek that mf out

- maybe not successfully, but would try his hardest

- "i'll be back in the morning, get some rest"

- "I can find them myself if I want to, you know"

- embarrassed blush

- because he KNOWS you can take care of yourself

- "of course, but right now you're hurt. as your partner, i will do what must be done on your behalf darling"

- probably shows up the following morning with battle scars of his own

- the guards found you in the garden, passed out in the maze

- blood trickled down your arm, a large gash marking your bicep

- ran you up to the palace and immediately to the medical wing

- them]n nadia gets word

- the calm, collected queen act disappears

- abandons anything she's doing, anybody she's talking to

- "we will finish this at a different time, i have more important matters to attend to"

- she is so worried and it's honestly adorable

- very much giving "where tf are they?" energy

- god i love her so much

- anyways um

- asks the nurses over and over what happened, if you're okay, etc.

- watches the physicians and nurses like a hawk as they clean the wound and suture the cut

- and they're so intimidated lmao they never come face to face with her literally ever

- brushes your hair back from your face as they do so

- holds your hands

- would demand that you be brought to her sleeping chamber

- so that's where you wake up! how cute

- she's laying beside you, her brows furrowed

- maybe even her eyes are a little hazy

- "y/n, sweetheart, do you remember what happened?"

- patiently waits for your answer, you're still a little groggy

- you were either attacked by an animal and passed out from the fright

- or you were attacked by an armed person and was knocked out

- either way, the guards are on it

- nadia isn't letting whoever or whatever did this get away without a fight

- the palace is meant to be a safe haven for you

- for the both of you

- "well, don't you worry, we'll take care of that"

- you try to sit up but she won't let you

- "oh no, you must stay down, y/n. you are possibly concussed from the fall"

- "oh okay, sorry"

- "is there anything i can get you?"

- the countess of vesuvia, serving you in your time of need

- "just some water would be nice"

- "of course, i'll have some brought up right away"

- i literally feel like he would just start crying straight up

- cause like he has some problems anyway

- he big sad boi

- and you coming home to the hut bleeding from a gash in the arch of your foot is not helping

- picks you and carries you to the bed without a word

- just starts examining the cut

- inanna is also very concerned

- she licks the blood from the cut, she's trying to be helpful

- meanwhile muriel is stumbling around the hut looking for anything to stop the bleeding, disinfect it, bandage it, anything

- but he's not the best about keeping that stuff in stock

- keeps looking back at you with worry in his eyes

- he doesn't know what to do

- "muriel, let me see if i can contact asra. maybe he or julian can bring me a salve. i'm pretty sure i'm gonna need stitches"

- low-key makes him feel worse

- cause he feels like he's unable to care for you and keep your safe

- even tho this was just an accident

- he's breathing really fast, his anxiety creeping

- agrees anyway, but goes to get them himself

- "i'll be back soon, just keep this piece of cloth pressed against it"

- cause you're bleeding like a lot

- inanna stays behind

- he returns very quickly with julian in tow, though he doesn't look happy about it

- leaves the hut without another word

- julian gets to work immediately

- "so, you cut your foot i see"

- smartass.

- "yeah, muriel always tells me to put on shoes when i walk in the woods but i love to feel the grass beneath my feet"

- julian chuckled at this

- "and i'm assuming you, what, stepped on a rock?"

- "...yeah, sliced it right open"

- after julian is done cleaning up the cut, he tells you to just stay off of it for a while and make sure it doesn't get infected

- once he's gone, muriel trudges back into the hut

- "muriel, baby, it was just a cut it's not a big deal"

- but his eyes look hurt, and you beckon him toward the bed

- "hey," your hands on his cheeks, "i'm okay, really"

- "sorry, i just got scared. blood is still a trigger for me and since you got hurt in my woods, i felt like it was my fault"

- "muriel, of course it wasn't your fault"

- he really needed a hug

- after this instance, he made sure to keep medical supplies in the hut and you promised to try and wear shoes in the woods more often than not

- "i'll try my best to be more careful. deal?"

- sweet lil smile

- "deal."

- "oh my god, y/n, what the hell happened??"

- you were tending the garden

- without her supervision

- and the garden sheers might have sliced into the palm of your hand

- deep

- brings you over to the sink and runs water over the cut, covering it with a towel when the dripping blood had been washed away

- girl is on the move

- cause she knows what to do! love that

- low-key a main reason why julian managed to live as long as he has

- pepi is curiously perched atop one of the counters, peering down

- finds her personal first aid kit she had stashed in the bathroom

- guides you over to sit on the counter while she tries to figure out what to do

- "damn, you really cut yourself, y/n"

- "sorry! i think i just got a little carried away"

- she giggles at that, though she is still worried about the fact that it won't stop bleeding

- gently wraps the cut in gauze and adheres it together

- places a kiss to your fingertips

- "all done! no more gardening for you!"

- "hey, why not?"

- "well you don't want that cut to open back up again and again, do you?"

- "no"

- "alright then," she smiled, moving to put away the first aid kit again, "and we're going up to the palace medical wing first thing tomorrow morning to make sure it's not infected"

- eye roll

- "yes ma'am" you mocked

- even though you know it's just because she loves you

- "but since you got hurt, you want me to bake you some cookies?"

- "only if you let me eat the dough!"

- good god do i love this man

- but he is so self-absorbed it's actually insane

- and I feel like he wouldn't even notice at first

- cause he's too focused on himself

- gazing into the mirror without a care in the world when you walked in

- "y/n, thank goodness you're home, how do you feel about these pants?"

- you just hobbled to the nearest seat, hand resting over the gash on your knee

- mercedes and melchior were lazing across a rug at the base of his mirror, their attention set on you

- "u-um, yeah, they look good"

- literally just trying not to bleed out, over here

- "good? oh really, now, y/n don't they look amazing?"

- "yes, they look ama- ow, damnit"

- then he turned around

- immediate shock and worry! oh no oh no y/n is hurt!

- mercedes and melchior walked over first, whining as they took in the cut, brushing around the edges

- lucio raced over, squatting down in front of you, and began examining the cut

- "hey, hey, what happened?"

- "i accidentally tripped on my walk in the garden and scraped my knee on the cobblestone"

- he was lightly touching around the cut, gauging how sensitive it was

- when you flinched he stopped, looking into your eyes with a soft "sorry"

- "i think i need to go to the palace infirmary"

- "oh there's no need, i can take care of you!"

- you were not convinced he could take care of you, at least not well

- "uh, lucio, are you sure?"

- he looked slightly offended, at that

- "you know, y/n, i did fight in battles at one point. i have not only tended to my own wounds, but the wounds of others, as well"

- you giggled at the thought

- "much to your protest, though, i'm sure"

- he moved to the small cabinet of medical supplies in the ensuite to your bedroom, returning to your side with it in hand

- "at points, but i don't mind helping you in the slightest"

- for all of his antics, his soft side was enough to make you fall in love all over again

- and although i know he would take care of you in literally any situation, i can't say for certainty that he would stick around and place nurse lucio for long if a person had hurt you

- attacked you

- much like nadia, the guards would be sent out without a second thought, lucio leading the pack in the search for you aggressor

[blueeyedgeorgie]

Wide Awake-Dream Was Taken

A/N: Here’s Pt. 2 bitches. I hope you all enjoy ! Also, please go support and follow @notphilosopherstudentblog​ because she helped me out with this because she’s so intelligent. <3

Btw Title is based off Katy Perry’s song Wide Awake

Pronouns: She/Her

Word Count: 3.5k+

_________

It was early. Too early for Y/n to be crying. But her she was, sitting in bed, clinging to one of Clay's old shirts. In the past, it was normal for her to steal a couple of his belongings. It was typical of Y/n to invite herself into his closet, taking whatever she wanted to wear, whenever she wanted. But now it just felt wrong.

There were only a few items left Y/n had that were his. She never washed this shirt, she had only worn it once. She could still remember the day she stole it.

"Y/n, you've got to be kidding," Clay turned in his desk chair. She had just walked out of his closet wearing an oversized grey t-shirt. "You're seriously going to leave me with five pieces of clothing."

She shot him a playful look, taking a moment to admire herself in the nearest mirror. "I'm sorry Mr. 15 million subscribers. You can always buy more clothes with all that money."

"Fine... it looks better on you anyway."

She had spent the rest of the day in his shirt. And by the end of the day, the scent of his laundry detergent was strong. For an odd reason, the t-shirt had spent weeks in the back of Y/n's closet, untouched. At least, until this morning.

All night she was toss and turning. It seemed impossible for her to get a moment of sleep, her mind had been racing. The only reason she wasn't able to sleep was because of one person; Clay. Their fight had played over and over again in her mind.

'But Y/n, I really do love you.'

There were so many different ways the night could've ended. But it was her fault it ended how it did. If only she hadn't asked for him to step out of the stupid restaurant with her. She didn't need to make a scene, but she still did. This was all her fault.

The sound of her phone buzzing had pulled Y/n away from the piece of fabric in her hands. Looking down at her nightstand, she glanced at the electronic. Wilbur was calling. With a sigh, hesitantly she reached for the phone.

"Hey, Y/n."

"Morning, Wilbur."

The brunette bit his lip at the sound of her voice. He could tell she had a rough night. "Are you doing alright?"

"I'm..." she paused, looking down at the shirt in her lap. "Yeah, I'm doing better."

"That's good to hear," For some odd reason, he was pacing. It wasn't normal for him to pace back and forth. He was already dressed for the day, wearing a set of brown pants with a creme button-up shirt. A pair of glasses rested on his face as he spoke. "George and I were hoping to go get some breakfast. Do you think you could show us somewhere good?"

"Yeah, I'm up for breakfast. What about Nick and Clay?" If Clay was coming, she didn't know what she'd do. There would be tension, but maybe she could find a way to patch everything up between them.

"Nick's going over to Clay's. They wanna have a bit of time together."

"Oh, okay... when do you guys wanna meet up?"

"Maybe 30 minutes to an hour?"

"An hour it is."

Before preparing to go out, Y/n had texted Wilbur a location point to meet up. It was a nice restaurant located in town, it had always been one of her favorite places to eat. George and Wilbur had gotten a table outside, it was nice out for a day in Flordia.

"Do you think she's gonna do it?"

Wilbur glanced across the table to George, "Honestly, probably not." He let out a sigh, " hope she agrees. I really do. But it's gonna be hard for her to let go. I just think it'd be better if they got some time away from each other."

"You're right. As good of friends they are, they need a break from each other." They both knew it wasn't a good idea for Y/n to stay in Flordia at the moment, she needed a moment away from Clay. So Wilbur had come up with an idea to get Y/n to take a break.

"What do you think of Elise?" Changing the subject, George leaned back in his chair. It was rare for Clay's girlfriend to come up in conversation. She seemed like such a touchy subject in the group. She was definitely a sweetheart, but it seemed like she appeared out of nowhere. The group had been planning future Dream SMP roleplay on a Discord call. It had been so brief when Clay mentioned her. 'Hey guys, I just wanted to mention I started dating somebody.' It was smart of George to hold his tongue because of what else Clay had to say. 'Her name is Elise and she's 19.'

Most of the group had expected Clay and Y/n to end up together. They were best friends who lived in the same town. There was constant flirting going on between them. And not to mention Y/n had always been there to support Clay through the bad and good.

"Hey, guys!"

Both of the British men were pulled out of their thoughts by the sound of her voice. Y/n was quick to take a seat by Wilbur. "Have we ordered yet?"

"No actually, we've been waiting for you." George fixed his posture, his classic grin appeared on his face. "Got any recommendations for drinks?"

"My go-to has to be a mimosa and the eggs benedict."

The knock came as a surprise, but there were a lot of surprises happening this morning. Clay had woken up earlier than usual. Naturally, he'd get up around 9 or 10, but today he woke at 7. He couldn't go to bed for a few more hours, his mind wouldn't quit racing with thoughts. He had ended up skipping breakfast, he wasn't hungry today. It was normal for him to eat something, he always woke up starved. The early knock was the cherry on top of the cake of the surprises happening today.

"Hey Nick, what are you doing here?" Clay glanced behind his friend, looking for any sign of the rest of his friends. Originally, they had planned to meet up later that afternoon at his place. "I thought you were coming by at noon?"

Nick stood on the porch, burying his hands into the pockets of his jeans. It was early in the morning, yet it was already warm outside. "Yeah, sorry I didn't ask if I could come by earlier. I just wanted some time alone with you."

"Cool, make yourself at home," Stepping aside, the blonde opened the door a bit wider for his friend. "Sorry it's a bit messy, I was planning to clean up before you guys showed up."

The pair had made their way to Clay's living room. It was nice, but still a bit messy just as he said. As the blonde began to pick up after himself, the pair had a bit of small banter.

"Is Elise gonna come by this afternoon?" Nick watched as Clay picked up a couple of items sitting on the coffee table.

"Uh, no. I think she had work today."

"Oh, what about Y/n?"

Clay tensed, pausing for a second. She had been on his mind a lot since the last time he saw her. The way she looked at him... it hurt. It felt like his heart was being ripped out of his chest. This morning she was all he could think of. He missed her good morning texts, the way she'd update him about little situations happening in her schedule, when she would randomly face time him just to say: 'I wanted to see your stupid face because I missed it.'

"I... she's not coming."

"Why's that?"

"You know why, Nick." Clay let out a sigh, taking a seat on the couch. He didn't know what he could do, he was the one who messed everything up. If he tried to apologize, he might even piss Y/n off even more. She had always been a hardass about being hurt or betrayed, it was hard for her to give people a second chance. "I don't even think she knows we're all planning to meet up later today."

"Dude... it's weird seeing you two like this. It feels wrong." The two friends looked at one another, it seemed like Nick could tell exactly what Clay was thinking. 'It is wrong.'

"I miss her. But I was also the one who fucked everything up by ignoring her for weeks."

"Why'd you even do that?"

"Because I fell in love with her. I was scared she didn't feel the same. So I distanced myself and looked for someone to start a relationship with.  That's why I met Elise."

"Clay... you're an idiot."

"I know."

Turning, Wilbur looked at Y/n. She was halfway finished with her meal. Everything was going great, she seemed so happy just to be able to talk with two friends. It seemed like the best time to spring the idea on her.

"Hey, Y/n?"

"Yes, Wilbur?"

He bit his lip, glancing at the man sitting on the other side of the table. George gave a brief nod, knowing what was going to happen next. "George and I had an idea we'd like to share with you."

"What is it?"

"You know how you've been talking about how you've always wanted to visit us in London?"

"Yeah..."

Wilbur paused, looking back at George for a second. "Well, we were thinking... I have a free room in my place. Why don't you spend one of two months with me just to see how you like London?"

Y/n's face lit up. "That sounds great, Wilbur. I... wow. That sounds so fun!" She paused, her smile disappeared. "But what about my house? I can't just abandon it for a month."

Wilbur bit his lip, 'Shit.'

"Clay can stop by once a week, just to make sure everything's fine. I'm positive he'll do it for you," George was quick to jump into the conversation. As soon as he mentioned Clay, Wilbur shot him a look. Y/n tensed at the sound of his name.

"Listen Y/n, you don't have to do it. Just keep the idea in mind, you can give me an answer before George and I leave."

"Okay..." Y/n bit her lip, looking at her food. She knew the only right answer was yes, but it was going to be hard to talk to Clay about this. "I think... I think I wanna do this. I wanna go with you guys."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, but... just give me some time to think it over."

"We're always here for you, Y/n. No pressure." Wilbur placed a hand on Y/n's. He wanted her to come to London, everything would be better. He cared a lot about Y/n, he really did. He just wanted to see her happy.

"I just want her to be happy," Clay let out a sigh, opening the refrigerator door. His eyes skimmed over what there was, he had gone grocery shopping the other day to plan for today. He still wasn't hungry.

"Everything's gonna get-" Nick paused, he was interrupted by the sound of Clay's phone ringing. There was a moment of silence as the blonde closed the refrigerator, approaching his phone on the kitchen counter.

"It's Y/n."

"What?"

"Do I pick it up?" Clay glanced at his friend.

"yes, yes, yes! Do it!"

Clay was quick to pick up the phone, putting it to his ear. "Hello?"

"Hey, Clay."

"Hey, Y/n."

"Do you..." she paused, "Do you have a moment to talk?"

"Yeah, I can talk." Clay leaned against the counter, listening to her intently. It had only been a few days, but he missed her voice. He could tell she was down.

"I know this seems like the wrong time to be asking for favors and everything, considering everything that has happened this last week. But... I need your help with something." She paused again. He could tell she was hesitating, as though something was keeping her back. "I think I'm gonna be gone for a while. And I just need someone to check up with my house every couple of days. Could you do that? It's fine if you don't want to, it was a stupid idea of me to ask you anyways-"

"No, yeah. Of course, I'll check up on your house for you, Y/n." He was quick to cut her off. The last thing he wanted was for her to think she couldn't turn to him for help anymore. "And it's not stupid of you to ask me. I'll always be here if you need something or need help."

She scoffed, "You weren't there for me these past few weeks." She stopped herself again for the third time. "I'm sorry, that was really bitchy of me."

"I deserved it," he could only chuckle. Y/n was still herself. "But yeah, is there anything else you need... or want to talk about?"

"I... no. No, that's it. I guess I'll talk to you... eventually."

"Alright," Clay fought back the urge to let out a disappointed sigh. "I'll see you." Without saying goodbye, she hung up the phone. He didn't know what to expect next, he wasn't even sure whether this was a step in the right direction or not.

Staring at the box, Y/n felt herself tear up for the hundredth time this week. This was going to be a hard task to complete, but it was going to help her let go.

Walking around the house, Y/n picked up item by item. Anything that belonged to Clay was going in the box.  A few t-shirts, a couple of CDs she stole, one of his coffee cups. Y/n wasn't even sure how the cup had gotten to her house, but she knew it belonged to Clay. All of her coffee cups matched, all the same color and shape. But... this one cup had shown up in her pantry one day. Every time Clay had spent the night, he'd start the morning off with a cup of coffee, only using that cup.

At this point, Y/n was picking up items that held too strong memories of him. The box had quickly filled, it felt strange. It seemed like she had just lost a chunk of her house. Of her life. This needed to happen. This was the only way they'd be able to keep their friendship.

Y/n had agreed to come to London with Wilbur, she was finally fully on board. Two suitcases sat by her front door as she waited for Wilbur and George to arrive. She would only be in Florida for a few more hours, she needed to give this box back to him. Maybe she could just say screw it, leave it here under her bed, hidden away. So when she'd return she'd be comforted by his shirts and hoodies, she'd listen to his songs and cry.

No. She couldn't do that. If she did that she wouldn't be letting go of everything. Y/n needed closure, it'd be the best for them both and she knew it. Pulling her out of her thoughts, Y/n heard a knock on her door. It was time.

"Morning, Y/n."

"Morning, Wilbur." Y/n smiled, embracing her friend in a hug as soon as she opened the door.

"George is in the car. We got coffee too." Wilbur looked down at her, his arms still wrapped around her waist, holding her close. "You're positive you want to do this?"

"Yes, I need to."

"Alright, then. I'll support you with whatever decision you make." He finally stepped aside, moving to grab her suitcases. Y/n grabbed the box, she had moved it into the hallway before greeting Wilbur. With one more glance, she looked down her hallway before closing the door. As soon as her home was locked up, Y/n had dropped her keys into the box. This was going to be the final step before London. Giving it all back.

George and Y/n greeted each other, Y/n giving him a quick hug before entering the car. The rest of the time, the car ride was quiet. There was obviously going to be tension. On their way, Y/n kept thinking to herself about what she was going to say. What if she fucked it all up? What if they broke out into another fight?

"Here we are."

Y/n sucked in a breath, looking over at the familiar house. This was the final step.

"Y/n, do you need either of us to walk up with you?" Wilbur spoke, he noticed the way she looked at the house.

She shook her head. "No, I got this..." Stepping out of the car, there were only a few words she'd repeat to herself. 'This is the final step. This is the final step. This is the final step.' It felt like it took forever for her to reach his porch.

As soon as she was face to face with the wooden door, she was quick to hit the doorbell. She just wanted to get this over with, fast. A few moments passed, and just as she reached to hit the doorbell again, she stepped back. The door was opening.

"Y/n?" Clay yawned, his hair was a mess. It was obvious she had just woken him up. "What are you-"

"It's time for me to go now. I'm sorry for waking you up. Here are my keys and a few of your items in case you wanted them while I was-"

"Woah, woah, woah." He interrupted her, rubbing his eyes. "Slow down, you're talking fast. You're leaving? Right now?"

"I..." she sighed. "Yeah, I am."

"And this..." he looked down at the box in her hands. "They're all mine?"

"Yeah, that's kinda the whole point." She gave him a look, "Considering the box says your name."

"Alright... thank you," he nodded, carefully picking the box up from her. "How long are you gonna be gone?"

"I'm not sure. I just know I have to go."

"Why?"

"Because of us, Clay. It'd be better for both of us. We need time apart. We have so much going on in each other's lives. I just need a break."

He watched her, she looked close to tears. Without thinking, Clay pulled his friend into his embrace, holding her close. "I understand. Take as much time as you need. I'll be here."

"Thank you."

The hug was short, Y/n was the first to pull away. As soon as it was over, she muttered a quick goodbye, hurrying back to the car. When the car door shut, Wilbur was quick to jump to asking questions.

"Are you okay? Do you need anything? You're completely sure you want to do this?"

"I'm fine, Wilbur."

"Alright, I just wanted to check." Wilbur paused, looking out the window. "Y/n, would you mind if George and I said our goodbyes to Clay?"

"Go ahead, I'm not the boss of you."

Sitting in the car alone, Y/n got a moment to catch her breath and stop the tears from forming. She did it. She completed the final step. She could do whatever she wanted now. The moment alone in the car felt short, George and Wilbur were back in the car in what felt like seconds. Only, Wilbur sat in the back with Y/n, George driving by himself.

"You ready, Y/n?"

"More than anything." Y/n looked at Wilbur, the way he smiled at her just felt... good. Looking down, she noticed Wilbur gently grabbing her hand in his. She smiled, things were going to start getting good for her, she knew it.

"Wow okay, now I just feel like a driver for you two." George shot a dirty look in the mirror.

"A bad driver," Y/n grinned at her friend. "Start moving, Mr. colorblind." "If I get a ticket for running a red light, I'm blaming you."

With a yawn, Y/n opened her eyes. She had another good night of sleep, it had been weeks since she had a bad night of sleep. For eight months, she had lived in London. At this point, her house in Flordia was sold to a family of three, and she was no longer flatmates with Wilbur. Instead, she was his girlfriend.

Turning over, she faced the beautiful brunette. He was still asleep. She owed him everything. She was now an influencer because of him, he had helped her set up her YouTube channel and introduced her to the fans. He thought it'd be a good job for her, considering how she was a social butterfly and carry conversations.

Clay and Y/n didn't interact as much as they use to. They'd interact on the Dream SMP and over social media. But it was rare for them to speak in private. The only way their relationship got better was by them distancing themselves. What was a beautiful friendship had turned into an acquaintanceship. Clay was still dating Elise, but it seemed like things weren't going the best and there were signs of him planning to break up with her soon.

Wilbur peeked an eye open, looking at his girlfriend. "Morning, Y/n."

"Morning, Wilbur."

Y/n smiled, she knew she was right. Everything got better for her. After all, When the rain ends, there will always be a rainbow.

[kaiparker-avengerssmut]

Their Doll 11

Silent scream

B.Barnes x Stark!Reader, S.Rogers x Stark!Reader

series synopsis:  y/n Stark, all records of her non existent, and yet Hydra still find her. When she is kidnapped by a certain super-soldier and no one believes her, she finds herself searching for unexpected familiarity in her not-so-distant past.

Series Warnings: smut, violence, torture, swearing

Chapter Summary: y/n gets shut up

Warnings: mentions of violence, swearing

A/n: The timeline in this has been altered, as there I things I wanted to include but I also wanted this fic to follow the storyline/timeline of Winter Soldier and Civil war.So for purposes of this fanfic, Peter Parker was discovered by Tony at a much younger age - when he was bitten - and has been an intern with him since, almost like a protégée.(For the purposes of this story Peter was bitten much younger too - more like when he was 9 or ten rather than 14/15)

Masterlist | Series Masterlist

"Fuck you." I snapped, mustering all the saliva I could before spitting it at his face. He flinched back when it splattered over his cheek, his fingers swiping through the spittle before he was shaking it from them and standing back to his full height.

"It appears this one is never going to cooperate. If she won't give us information, why let our experimentations on her possibly...benefit the girl the the future?" The general spoke menacingly to the guards behind me. "How about way find a way to shut her up?"

My heat thudded so hard in my chest it was like someone was punching me from the inside, all air knocked from my lungs before I was being hoisted up to my feet again with two rough grips on my upper arms. My chest heaving, I coughed a ragged breath before composing myself. The glint of the silver blade in the corner of my vision sent my eyes bugging out of my skull and my mind into a flat panic.

So, I did what any rational person with my capabilities would do. I began to hum the deep melody - one a seldom sung - and a smirk crawled its way onto my now curved lips. Clearly, the general was prepared, but the two guards behind we weren't so lucky.

A desperate cry pierced my tune, harmonising with my voice as I heard the havoc I was causing. This was the first time I'd enjoyed a kill, the very first time I'd wanted to use my powers for such a horrific reason. I'd only ever used this part of my power a few times, but this was the only time I'd been fully lucid whilst doing so.

Some people want nothing more than to blow their enemies' brains out, and trust me when I tell you; It felt good.

However, luck was never on my side, and the General had come full prepared. He wasn't even affected, it must've been something to do with the funny earpiece he was wearing.

As my eyes met his, the General's face held non of the cocky, smug tones that I'd expect. No, the only word I could use to describe his old and crinkled features was pure ire, and it was directed at me.

"You conniving, vile little bitch!" He snarled, the flash of silver weeding a sense of utter and complete dread, tangled with fear inside of me, uprooting my confidence. I don't remember a lot after that, to tell you the truth. I know the blade sliced along my throat. I know everything was rained black. And that's about it.

...

Awakening with a gasp was the last thing I expected to happen. The sight of the blade risen in front of the general burned into my mind, almost as if it'd been scorned against my flesh. But here I was: awake, gasping for breath, completely surrounded by doctors I'd never seen before.

My hand instantly flew to my neck, a stinging sensation pulsing from the delicate skin. I hissed as my sweaty palm made contact with the bandage, the material corse and scratchy against my skin. As a doctor waddled over to me, needle in hand, I flailed desperately, a silent scream ripping from my throat.

Hang on a second-

Silent scream? I tried again, the shrill noise that should be tearing from me simply vanishing as it hit my throat. My eyes widened with the realisation, my bottom lip wobbling as I suddenly pieces together what had happened.

He said he'd have to shut me up, didn't he? The thought made me want to scream loudly, that the blade had touched my skin and left me with no defence.

They took away the hell they'd reigned upon me, something I'd wished I could be rid of for years, and now I was disappointed. Maybe this was their plan all along, that little voice in my head sang. The tears pricked at my eyes, which rolled back lazily as the scratch of the needle poked at my neck.

...

My calloused fingers ran over the cut tirelessly, trying to itch somewhere that I could never seem to find. I don't know how long I was sedated for, but since waking up the bleeding had stopped and there was now an offensive red line that slid horizontally across my neck.

Every time I touched it, it coaxed a wince from me, and yet that's all I seemed to do. It was like poking a bruise, I guess. The more it hurts the more you want to do it.

They'd returned me to my cell, clearly very little need for restraints against my weakened, starved and dehydrated body. I could see the flesh thinning on my arms, my ribs pressing painfully against my skin. Not only could I see the hunger, but I could feel it.

Manifesting, biting, gnawing hunger. The type that are you from inside out, devouring everything of you until the only thing you could think about was eating. Huh, I guess I was already at that stage then.

My eyes remained locked in place, glossy with the endless tears as I stared at the floor. If I really looked hard enough, the still wet blood smeared over the floors of the hallway resembled something close to strawberry jam. The thoughts of the sickly sweat substance spread over a perfectly toasted piece of bread, accompanied with a big glass of fresh orange juice and washed down by a large coffee made my mouth water. The booming rumble in my stomach made the groan, even more drawn out than expected when I remembered all I'd get to eat today: a small bread roll and a tiny glass of water.

Sadly, the sink in my cell did not contain drinking water. The liquid was so discoloured that I purposely avoided washing me hands, preferring to possible have my own germs coating my hands than whatever they were giving me. I'm not kicking you about, I genuinely think the water was filtered through a clump of fucking horse shit, mixed with fish guts and complimented with a hint of rotting fruit. If I could help it, I'd be dodging that water like the plague (if it didn't contain one already) for the rest of my life.

I'm not really sure why, but my head snapped up in surprise why the door sprang open, a single guard entering.

"The general requires your presence." He deadpanned, eyes cold as eyes and sharp as a knife as they stabbed through me. I wanted to fight back, stay glued to the spot and snap back some snarky remark, but in my current condition I almost couldn't bring myself to care where I was about to be taken, or why for that matter.

I stood without a word, silently following the man until we reached an unfamiliar metal door. I found it almost laughable, really, that they'd reduced my strength so much, that no one even considered putting me any sort of restraints anymore.

The door was pushed open with a child-like whine emitting from its rusty hinges, the metal scraping over the concrete floor painfully. The guard simply grabbed my arm before tugging me into the room, letting the door shut behind his with a hollow thunk.

"Ah, she has arrived!" The general's voice exclaimed, a deviant smile spreading over his thin lips. "And just in time to meet Mr Pierce, too." He said menacingly.

I felt embarrassed, exposed, stood before the room of men. My hair was a mess, tears streaking my reddened face, eyes puffy from crying and the only clothes a wore was a now-battered hospital gown. My eyes darted around nervously, trying to avoid the blonde man sat before me, chin resting in his palm as he surveyed me.

"Why is this one...important?" The man asked, eyeing me up and down before his eyes seemed to fixate on my neck. The scar.

"This," the general spoke, but Mr Pierce kept his eyes on me, "is Miss y/n Stark." Mr Pierce's eyes widened ever so slightly, but it was barely noticeable.

"As in Tony Stark?" Pierce pondered.

"The very same." The general smirked.

"She seems awfully...quiet, for a Stark." Pierce said with almost a hint of disgust, eyes still glued to my shaking frame.

"That's because we shut her up." The general snapped, awfully harshly.

"Is that the scar? How fresh is it?" Pierce jabbed his questions, curiosity clearly becoming him in the moment.

"Indeed. Our doctors here are very good, Sir. They had her all patched up and out of bandages in just three days." The general bragged, shoulders back and head held high as if he was posing for a portrait.

"I see." Pierce mused, brows furrowed in thought. "What do you plan to do with her? Now that she can't tell you anything?"

"Oh, trust me, sir. She wasn't giving anything up either way," he paused, striding over to me and yanking my head back with a fistful of hair, my back mow  pressed to his chest and his mouth at my ear, "isn't that right, sweetheart?"he clarified, and I didn't hesitate to nod my head as much as his grip would allow.

"So why isn't she dead?" Pierce gritted, seemingly annoyed. "It's not like Tony's attached to her, he never looked for her and I've never even heard him mention her."

"But then they'll keep coming. I don't want the avengers on my back, and I'm sure you don't either." Pierce hummed in agreement. "She's with them - her and that Captain America guy arrived together - so why not use her to send a message?" The general suggested.

...

That's how I found myself tied up, wrists bound and gun to my head as I sat shakily in a chair in the middle of the quinjet. I had no clue how long I'd been since that day, but I do know that I had been sedated once again. The flimsy hospital gown allowed a shiver to chill me, skin  forming goosebumps as I sat before the open door or the quinjet.

"You will tell them exactly as I just did. Got it?" The general pressed, pushing the gun into my head hard enough to make by head throb. Tears biting at my eyes, I nodded furiously, now determined to live with the promise of being free again. "Good. Soldat, make sure she gets back to New York without being seen, I'd hate to have to spill more blood than we intended." The general demanded, a figure rustling its way out of the shadows at the edge of the room. A gasp tore from my throat at the sight of him - clad in black leather and arm as silver as the moon. The soldier - my soldier.

But he simple stared through me, eyes blank and clouded in a coldness I'd never had directed at me from him before.

"And make sure you don't fail this time, soldat." The general snapped. The soldier nodded solemnly, the echoing of boots thudding filling both their ears as the general walked off the ship.

[runningdownthatroad]

I just have to get this off my chest after seeing some very disturbing posts about 9/11 floating around on my dash as well as some truly crude commentary. A lot probably won't agree with my sentiments but I feel like this needs to be said.

I've seen a lot of things on Tumblr in the past that maybe I consider to be in poor taste or don't agree with but I usually just scroll past, sometimes block for curating sake, but today is the first time I truly was shell-shocked. To see the memes and blasé jokes people are making about this day are just absolutely horrific and appalling.

I get that a lot of people on this site now may not remember what happened that day and only learned second hand through school or media or other people telling them. I get that a lot occurred after this that wasn't right which we definitely should be learning from. I also get that there is a lot of anti-American and anti-white sentiments going around currently, especially on this site.

But here's the thing:

Not only Americans died that day. Not only white people died that day. That's the thing about terrorists and what these hijackers did: they don't care about your skin color, your culture, your religious preference, your sexual orientation, your gender orientation, your age, your economic status, your personality, whether you support them or not, your political persuasion, your job, or any of it. Everyone is fair game to them. For crying out loud, look at what the Afghani people are currently going through and how the Taliban are treating their own country's people, women especially. If you think this is bad (which it truly is), have you seen how things went under their rule before 9/11 even happened? Do you know their terrifyingly violent and brutal history? Women had acid thrown in their faces if they didn't wear a full hijab. People were mutilated or executed if they didn't fall in line with the law of the Taliban. And this doesn't even begin to go into Al-Qaeda or Isis. But I'm not here to talk about that or delve into that topic too much.

My point in mentioning all of this is that white Americans weren't the only ones that were killed that day. People of all faiths, of all colors, of different countries, died that day, too. And the unity that is consistently discussed every 9/11 anniversary is in regards to us being aware of that fact, us mourning all of their losses together, and the collective desire to come together and help once the planes hit and after the towers collapsed.

So when people say "why am I supposed to cry over white Americans getting killed that day" think about that. Not only white Americans died that day. And regardless of their color, their nationality, their culture, their religion, etc. anyone dying is always sad. Whether it be a jetliner being used as a weapon that crashed into their floor or someone dying of cancer or someone being killed in a mudslide or someone dying in a car accident -- it is always sad. And empathy should always be shown in response, even if it doesn't impact you personally. Let's not forget these people have loved ones that got left behind, that are still here.

So when people say "if something knocks into a cow and knocks it over, I'm not expected to care, but if something knocks into a building and knocks it over, suddenly I'm supposed to care?" think about that. People aren't grieving two large pieces of steel architecture. People aren't saying "always remember those two towers". The WTC Towers were a symbol (yes, for American wealth, I get it) but became so much more of a multi-faceted powerful symbol after 9/11. The towers represent a way of life before 9/11 happened, but more importantly they represent the people lost that day, who were in the towers when they collapsed. For all of the first responders who were stuck on those floors still trying to help evacuate people to safety when the buildings finally gave. The two footprints and two blue lights aren't a symbol of American wealth or a naivete and simpler way of life pre-9/11 - they are a symbol of memorialization for that day. The Freedom Tower was erected to show that despite the loss of that day, we stood united (even if there seems to be more and more division these days). It's a message to the world that yes, destruction and death happened that day in NYC, but so did rebuilding and life carrying on. It's a symbol of strength, resilience, and unity - something that was everywhere you looked days after this event occurred. The two towers (aka NYC) may have gotten knocked down but the city got back up. They weren't kept down - that's the point of the Freedom Tower.

When people say "I don't understand, what is it that I shouldn't be forgetting since I can't remember it anyway" here is what we all should be remembering despite our age or our connection (or lack thereof) with this event:

2,997 innocent civilians died that day. Among them were 343 firefighters, 37 police officers, 23 Port Authority police officers, 8 EMS workers, and 4 other first responders. Also among them were 246 people on the four planes that crashed.

The passengers of United Flight 93 made a choice to fight back against the hijackers and saved lives that day by sacrificing their own.

Many children lost parents. Many parents lost children. Many brothers lost sisters, and many sisters lost brothers. Many spouses lost their significant others. Many lost friends, family, and loved ones.

For those who want a better connection to this day who didn't experience it and/or don't remember it, and for those others who are seriously lacking in empathy: yes, it was a highly publicized event due to the hundreds of cameras (including media outlets) watching that day, but if the horrific images aren't enough to garner some of your empathy, then there are plenty of other resources at your disposal. Documentaries like 9/11 by James Hanlon and the Naudet brothers, 102 Minutes That Changed America (which shows you not only all of the first-hand eyewitness accounts that day but also lets you hear 911 calls, radio transmissions between firefighters, and people's reactions to the event and each other who were there), 9/11 Firefighters (on Discovery Plus) and even more recently, 9/11: The Turning Point (on Netflix) which provides a 360 degree view of the events that led up to 9/11, 9/11 itself, and what came after, displaying all different viewpoints. You can read the 9/11 Commission Report or there are several books and memoirs out there like Wake-Up Call by Kristen Breitweiser, or even historical accounts in books, newspaper articles, and online. But most importantly, listen to people's stories. The ones who were there, the ones who saw it happen, the ones who ran in to help, the ones who lost loved ones. That is the most important part and the most powerful. On Hulu, ABC News ran segments of 9/11 Twenty Years Later, "Women Of Resilience" being especially powerful. It's hard not to feel a human connection to these stories or any kind of empathy.

For those who are making these jokes and memes, if you like shows like 9-1-1 and Chicago Fire, etc, imagine those first responder characters rushing into those buildings to save lives and losing theirs in the process. If you don't remember 9/11 or feel any connection or empathy, imagine hundreds of Bucks or Eddies or Bobbys or Hens or Chimneys dying that day as they worked to save so many. Sorry to be so blunt because I love those characters too, but do you get a little bit of the connection now? Do you feel any empathy? I'm not trying to equate real life heroes and sheroes with fictional characters of course, but if it helps you to understand a little better in some way, well...I'm throwing it out there.

I myself lived in the Tri-State area at the time of the attacks. I remember seeing the second plane seconds before it crashed into the second building. I remember the devastation I felt watching the first tower collapse knowing that a loved one was most likely inside and how hard I cried thinking he was dead. (thankfully, he had been late to work that day and he got out of the area before the towers came down) I remember the relief and gratefulness we all felt hearing from him to assure us that he was alive when he finally was able to get to a phone, stating he was covered in dust and ash from the buildings. I remember the panic and fear we all felt, thinking the world was ending and we were all going to die, that this was it, this was World War III, after it was confirmed that the Pentagon had also been hit and there was also a downed plane in Pennsylvania. I remember the grief another loved one suffered because she lost her entire floor (she had been out sick that day) and every single one of her co-workers. I remember the race to pick up children from school and get them home as soon as possible. I remember the rage that coursed through us seeing the footage of some people in certain countries celebrating the attacks in the streets, enjoying the deaths of so many Americans, a couple of these countries who lost citizens themselves in these attacks. I remember the camping out in front of the televisions night after night for a week straight afterwards, watching the news 24/7, worrying that there might be more attacks. I remember the feeling of sheer terror anytime a plane was heard overhead or seen appearing low enough in the sky that you could practically make out which airline it was for months afterwards. I remember seeing the lights the first time they were lit from our home. I remember feeling pure fear not only for what happened that day but also what came afterwards (not yet understanding that these weren't practitioners of Islam that did this but radical extremists who had literally hijacked the religion). I remember seeing the devastation at Ground Zero through a tear in the fabric over a fence as we walked through the city months afterwards. I remember not wanting to fly for years. I remember the anger I felt that our government had failed us due to political bs between agencies and countless others (which we found out especially when the 9/11 Commission Report came out) and that because of this horrific and absurd failure, thousands of innocent people had died. I remember seeing the crushed ladder truck, and the toy of the little girl who was on one of the planes at the 9/11 Memorial Museum and all of the pictures in that room that just floored me. (I also remember being pissed off that many were treating it as a selfie op where they were allowed to take pictures, completely missing the point of the museum's existence) But most of all, I remember feeling that life would never be the same for any of us ever again, and that the feeling of safety we had naively enjoyed on September 10, 2001 would never return.

But I also remember the compassion and unity we saw rising in the country after those attacks. I remember the gratitude for all of our first responders, those we lost that day and those who were still with us, actively working to recover those lost and to clear Ground Zero. I remember the feeling of collectiveness, that we all shared grief and showed support to one another in those days afterwards. I remember the fallen heroes and sheroes who ran into those buildings, who were off duty but raced from wherever they were that day to come and help. I remember The Man In the Red Bandana aka Welles Crowther (and many like him who worked to save others) who has become another important symbol of that day. I remember hearing all of the stories of people helping one another before and after the towers collapsed. I remember the good that this day represents. That while we may have seen some of the worst of humanity that day in the form of violence, death, weaponized airplanes, and devastation, we also saw the very best of humanity in the form of our first responders and people helping one another.

Look, did Islamophobia happen? Yes. Was it right? No, absolutely not. As I stated above, I myself feared the idea of the religion until I was educated by a friend of mine about the difference between the religion and extremism. This form of hijacking ideology can be seen in examples like the Westboro Baptist Church or even Hitler. Terrorists do not represent the true spirit of Islam no matter what the former tries to force people to believe. Just as the WBC is not the true spirit of Christianity, and so on and so forth. But even during the time I had feared the religion before gaining understanding and clarity, I never confronted or mistreated any practicing Muslim or Arab-American. Ever. I never posted hate or spewed vitriol against them. Just like with the current pandemic, I still cannot believe there are people out there attack Asian-Americans as if this whole thing is their fault. That's still mind boggling to me and it is absolutely 100% WRONG. It should not be happening. Same with Islamophobia. And it breaks my heart to read that many Arab-Americans and practicing Muslims still worry when this anniversary comes around that they may be attacked. It might not mean much, but I just want to say I am truly sorry for that and you have my full support. Always.

Did we go to war and was it just? Yes we did go to war. Was it just? Afghanistan? I need more information in order to have a fully-formed opinion but there are plenty who say yes and plenty who say no. Plenty who say we made things better over there (before we exited and the Taliban advanced) and plenty who say we didn't and only made it worse. I truly cannot say which assertion is correct and I think it would be narrow-minded and completely moronic (and possibly arrogant and presumptuous?) of me to speak on a subject I know so little about, one way or the other. Iraq? No, I don't think it was just and I honestly wish we could go back and do things differently.

But coming back to 9/11 and what this day means for so many, the people who died, the people who rushed headfirst into danger, the people who lost their loved ones. We saw incredible bravery, selflessness, and compassion for your fellow human that day despite what happened. We saw the strength within ourselves despite the fear and anger. We saw resilience. That is what the anniversary is meant to be a reminder of. The sacrifices, the loss, the courage, and the strength. Black, White, Gay, Straight, Christian, Muslim, Man, Woman, Young, Old -- it didn't matter. We all came together.

So regardless of whether it's the cool thing to do right now on this site (or elsewhere) to hate on America or 9/11 or white Americans or the anniversary itself on the very anniversary of these attacks, I ask that you please consider when posting these hurtful (and frankly harmful) words of hatred and vitriol such as referenced above that there are people out there who lost their loved ones on 9/11, that yes some of them may be on this very site and going through the 9/11 tag, and that some of them may have even lost a loved one in either war and are again on this site reading your words. Regardless of what you think or feel, please consider them and tag appropriately if you're going to post. Please consider that some of these people are currently losing their loved ones due to 9/11-related illnesses because of the cleanup at Ground Zero. Please consider that there are children who lost a parent or loved one, or who were orphaned that day (yes, they exist, we had some in our school district) who are also on this site reading your words. Basically, please just consider and be considerate. Please stop spreading hatred on a day that happened due to hatred; please stop perpetuating that cycle.

Like Martin Luther King Jr. said, "Darkness cannot drive out darkness, only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate, only love can do that."

TLDR: Love and light, my friends. Love and light. ✌️❤️

[boop-le-snoot]

PARTY FAVOURS I CHAPTER 32

💖 first time reader click here 💖

Summary: Stephen Strange being a grown-up. Reader being a grown-up. Kind of. Revenge plot starts now - don't be like the mercenary, don't threaten reader's family. Avengers being good.. bros? Good found family idk. More smut + plot coming soon.

The silence hung awkwardly over us. Stephen wasn't the one to wax poetics, usually, and I wasn't in the mood to do anything but curl up somewhere warm, chug a bottle of liquor and fall asleep. Sleep is like death without the committment and after my little outburst, I inwardly prayed and begged for the ground to open up and swallow me whole. Instead, I was directed to sit and drink my tea by the sorcerer, who, by the way, was beginning to look like a kicked puppy.

It was starting to become unbearable. "I'm listening," I finally croaked out, shocked at how raspy my voice sounded. As if someone had forced me to choke on some nails - and I felt like it, too. My hands were shaking, all but spilling the hot tea onto them.

"Princess..." His mouth did the thing when he was worried, lips pursed, their corners upturned. "What we did was not... Right, you were drugged without your consent. I am sure Tony feels the same way."

My eyebrows rose, words bubbling up to the surface as I fought the urge to simply start calling Stephen some strong names. Had he been blind the whole time I flirted with him, had he not seen both me and Tony ogling him when we thought nobody could see? Every time I joked about the sexual tension between them - you know what they say, every joke has a little bit of truth in it.

Or maybe the sorcerer had used the incident as a convenient excuse for our little fuck-fest to be a one-time thing? I expected more, I won't lie, but I wouldn't put it above him. I knew all too well that some men tended to simply... Avoid.

I was angry, probably rightfully so, but it was not the time for me to comfort an adult man. My own life was going to shit, I had no mental energy to unburden his baseless guilt. It was selfish and it made me feel even more like shit, but it was as if someone had flipped a switch inside of me. I just didn't care about someone's heartbreak. I needed to solve another problem, a much bigger than a man that couldn't make up his mind.

I had to find that damn mercenary. It was the only real threat hanging over our heads; unlike any mission that I've seen the team go on before, they had thrown all the forces into catching the man that had gotten into their safe space, their home. That threatened to take what they thought as theirs. Long gone were the days of comfortable domesticity.

"Okay," I replied, nodding curtly. "I wanted it, if it helps any. I thought you were attractive the first day I saw you." I spoke bluntly, beginning to feel like myself more and more with each word that I spoke. "And again, no strings have to be attached. I'm sure Tony will understand it too, it's not his first rodeo."

Stephen's head shot up from where he was examining his clasped hands, to study me with furrowed brows. Cloaky moved where it was wrapped around me, attracting the sorcerer's attention - I, unfortunately, did not understand the Cloak's sign language and what it told Stephen remained a mystery to me. I was just delighted to be out of the cold and and wet clothes.

"I think you misunderstood me," Stephen eyed me with surprise. "I want more, but..." He trailed off, unsure. "I don't know. I'm surprised Banner hasn't gone green on me yet. I'm a doctor, I should have known..."

So, he was pulling a me and wallowing in pity. Is this really how pathetic I looked when I used to mope around the house earlier? No wonder my mother thinks I'm a baby. "Stephen, I'm really not in the mood to listen to bullshit. I wanted it, you wanted it, great, we can move on. Because with everything that has happened to me, I really have no energy to convince you I like you even while sober when you're sabotaging yourself." Sure, I might have ripped off the motivational speech from a self-help book my mother used to have laying around. My patience was wearing thinner with each second. "There, I said it. I like you, my boyfriends like you, you're welcome to the club if you decide to believe the fact that I am telling the truth." And if he wouldn't, well, I could get over it. I was planning to never act upon my feelings for both Tony and Bruce, it hadn't been as hard as I thought it would be. Especially with me being busy enough to just ignore the feelings.

At some point, I had grown attached to Stephen. Perhaps, if I and Tony hadn't decided to mess around with the sorcerer at the party, my feelings wouldn't have bloomed into anything more than physical attraction. Murphy's law had a particularly strong affinity on me, I noticed, because over and over I found myself falling head over heels for emotionally unavailable men. It worked out with Tony, which wasn't as surprising as one might expect, considering we're two halves of a whole idiot, but then Bruce also decided to pucker up - Stephen was bound to be the rock that I trip on.

Or not? Soft lips pressed against my forehead, beard hair softly tickling the tip of my nose. I was pressed against a solid chest, surrounded by warmth and comfort. "I'm sorry, I'm an idiot," Steph whispered, voice quivering.

"Well, it's not like this... Relationship... I've got going on is something commonplace," My arms wrapped around him, a deep sigh relaxing my body into his. "I'm sorry I yelled at you. It wasn't right."

Stephen chuckled, all but pulling me bodily into his lap. "Don't worry, Princess. I deserved it." As he spoke, the Cloak carefully unwrapped itself from me, drifting away with a parting pat on my back. "Now what happened with your parents?" Large palms pushed the hair out of my face, stormy blue eyes looking at me with worry.

"I should probably assemble all my significant others for this conversation," There was little enthusiasm in discussing the incident. I was an adult and had enough money to get by for a few months, at least until I could patent one of my inventions. I had plenty of knick-knacks that should be able to interest buyers, that much I knew, and while the legal side of the process was a blank slate to me, I knew I could be charismatic enough to have someone work it out for me.

"I don't think I'll be able to take Steve seriously when he says 'assemble', now," My third boyfriend chuckled, which - wow, I didn't have boyfriends and now I had three? Should I be considering opening a factory or something? Stephen adjusted his hold on me. "Let's go, I'll portal us in."

"My car's out there with all my stuff. I'll have to drive," I protested but made no move to get out of his lap.

"Tony is a billionaire, he can pay someone to retrieve it," Shrugging carelessly, he produced a golden circle of magic, the common room couch in plain sight at the other side of it. I heard voices and then Clint's head peaked through, a curiously tilted eyebrow morphing into full fledged face of confusion upon seeing the two of us.

Yikes. I had forgotten about the state of my dress and the bruise on my cheek. "Hey, bird. I need a drink," I said the first thing that popped into my mind, causing both Clint and Steph to laugh as the sorcerer carried me into the tower through the portal.

"I'm starting to think you go out there and look for trouble on purpose," The archer sighed, pulling out his phone and texting rapidly. Mine vibrated, too, once he was done, which meant he'd called for a family meeting. Blergh.

In no time, Tony appeared, dark circles under his eyes and yesterday's shirt on, towing a worried Bruce behind him. One after the other, the Avengers tickled in, looking restless and exhausted. Loki's frown was well on its way to becoming a full sneer.

"Talk, please," He requested, eyeing me with concern.

"Good news is I got our rogue wizard back," I poked Stephen in the chest. He was blushing. "Bad news is my mother threw me out and my father didn't pick up the phone, so technically I'm homeless and parent-less," I decided that spitting out straight facts was the easiest way to go about it. I mean, there was no good way to tell what I just told them.

The storm that I anticipated didn't appear. Just a lot of disappointed sighs all around, especially from Tony, who looked twenty years older after I'd confessed to the current state of my affairs. "You're not homeless, you live here," He pointed out, rubbing his face and muttering some very strong words under his nose. Particularly, the expressions involved my mother and various methods of fornication.

"We got your back, doll," Bucky nodded, coming over to wrap me in a gentle hug. He was like a brother from another mother to me at this point, kind and goofy and sensible. "I would propose to teaching that harpy a lesson but I think she's beyond it."

"Perhaps it's for the best," Loki mused suddenly. "If I recall correctly, your mother was against your career of choice, which is idiotic. Science is a noble and prospective path." The Asgardian, too, gave me a hug.

I wasn't crying! There were ninjas, in the vents, cutting onions! "Stop it guys, I'm gonna cry. I already look like shit!" The protest was silenced by Bruce's lips on mine, his tiny smile briefly covering my mouth with tenderness. After that, everybody somehow decided it was their job to try and make me cry; like a bad bitch, I resisted, but eventually broke and started sniffling when Tony began rambling about building me my own lab and Wanda offered to help me decorate my new apartment.

No matter how much my mind screamed at me to refuse, I forced that noise down. Fighting against myself, accepting help despite feeling unworthy of it - it was probably the hardest thing I've done in my whole life.

Bruce volunteered to carry my prone body to Tony's bedroom which was quickly becoming the master bedroom for the three of us - ever since the incident, both of my scientists stuck close to me whenever possible, aggressively cuddling me whenever they decided it was time to get some sleep. Which wasn't much these days, if I was being honest. Persuading Bruce to stay with me was a novelty - usually he didn't resist, but that time, I had to repeat myself multiple times that the team could handle business even without him being present.

I had my ulterior motives, of course. Tony and Stephen needed to talk. I only hoped their egos wouldn't clash without me to mediate - having two boyfriends start a fight wasn't something I wanted to experience. I had zero experience in those matters and had no idea how to manage all that. Are there handbooks for polyamorous relationships? I stuck a mental post-it note inside my brain to check it out.

I fell asleep with Bruce wrapped around me and woke up in the same position, having been too exhausted to move even in my sleep. Voices, rough and quiet, were the first thing I heard upon syncing my brain into a resemblance of a working order, instantly recognizing Stephen's deep baritone and Tony's teasing drawl.

"Expect either Reindeer Games or Kim Possible to come and terrify you," My engineer didn't sound particularly ecstatic. His voice came from somewhere around my feet; the hand wrapped around my ankle, thumb gently stroking the skin, must've been his.

"Duly noted," Stephen's reply was equally sarcastic, sounding a little closer. The warmth coming from my side was him. I could smell the faint spices that surrounded him, smell that I'd come to associate with the Sanctum.

Bruce snored away, not a care in the world.

My body, on the other hand, felt rested for what felt the first time in years. A pleasant ache in my muscles had me begrudgingly squirm out of Banner'd grasp, shamelessly pushing up into Stephen as I stretched with a juicy yawn. "What's poppin'?" I rubbed my eyes, finding the men awake looking at me with fond amusement.

"Just watching," Tony smiled, causing me to giggle at his accidental meme-ing. Was it even accidental? I refused to believe that a man well versed in IT was oblivious to meme culture.

Stephen, on the other hand... "We've discussed some things, wanted to talk to you too." His hand stroked my hair, face expression soft unlike anything I'd ever seen him have. "But you were sleeping. So cute."

Me, cute? There was a puddle of drool the size of a dollar bill on my pillow, I was pretty sure some of it had even gotten in Bruce's hair. Banner's sleep was quiet except for every five minutes when he'd let out a snore with a force somewhere between a Mack truck and a whale in mating season.

Cute, sure.

Bruce groaned, a tell-tale sign of him waking up. I met his eyes, brown, shiny, a narrow edge of green around his irises. Huh. Do I have three boyfriends or four?

THE TAG LIST IS NOW OPEN! @another-stark-sub ​ @mostly-marvel-musings  @vozit ​ @littlegasps ​ @pilloclock ​ @shereadsinquiet @downeyreads ​ @hermione-grangers-wife ​ @individualistfem ​@sleep-i-ness @capbrie @lillsxd @agustdowney @dee-vn @justanotherblonde23 @fanngirl19 @persephonehemingway @softie-socks @schemefrenzy @letsby @romeo-the-cactus @jelly-fishy-babie @mikariell95 @gladiosamicitias

[mrsseverussnape]

Love Is You - chapter 8

A/n: This is one of the heaviest chapters i have written for this fanfic so it took couple of days to edit all over again.

Tw: suicidal thoughts

    Scarlett went to Remus's room for dinner as she promised him last night. They were close friends since their Hogwarts years and the friendship continued since back then. At one point or two when all 3 of them were drunk, it might have gotten a little bit further than a friendship but none of them talks about that.

"Welcome Scar, i was waiting for you." He smiled and hugged her.

"Sorry i am late. I went to London today, needed to do some stuff. They took more time than i expectedt."

"It's totally fine. Take a seat and tell me about your day." Remus served some food for themselves and sat down.

"First i went to the ministry, needed to talk to the minister. Because yesterday the new deputy minister came here to meet me and it was very awkward. Then i went to my house to check the stuff i need there, i will be moving there around Christmas. And lastly i stopped by at my parents’ house. What about you?"

"Nothing new, just lessons. Why was the meeting awkward?"

"Everything was off with him. The way he talks, the way he looks at me..." she grimaced her face. "Also he is not from the ministry, i never heard of him before but weirdly he looks familiar. Dorian said he came from France."

"What did he do to you?" Remus asked in concern.

She sighed. "He said: " you are pretty, what a shame that you have been cheated on..."

"Stupid arsehole. That's very rude and none of his business." He rubbed Scarlett's arm softly. “I can beat him up for you.” Remus joked to change the mood.

"He is not worth to spend your energy, fucker...Anyway, I couldn't ask Carina but... How is he, Sirius...?"

Remus sighed softly. "You know him, he is miserable without you... He has been drinking and smoking for Merlin knows how long…"

"Take care of him Remus, please... I have Carina with me but he is all alone…" her eyes filled with tears when she thought about him. Even though she was still angry with him; Scarlett has missed Sirius so much, all she wanted to do was be with him in their home.

"I will, promise." He held her hand reassuringly.

"I… i need to go Remus, i am sorry but i..." She stuttered while standing up from the chair.

"Scarlett where to? What’s going on?" Remus was confused at her sudden reaction.

"I need to see him." And she apparated the next second before he could say anything or stop her.

Remus stood there awkwardly after her apparation; he wasn't sure what to do but then he decided not to go after her. He knew Scarlett had a soft spot for Sirius and nothing would stop her from seeing him when she wanted.

    Scarlett found herself in front of their family house's door. She was controlled by her heart right now and her brain wasn't willing to correspond with her at all. She was aware that she would regret this decision the very next day but she couldn't stop herself and knocked on the door. He didn’t answer immediately so she knocked harder this time. Maybe she should have taken this as a sign. But then she heard footsteps getting closer to the door and there he was.

"Scarlett...!?" Sirius couldn't believe his eyes. He hasn't drank that much tonight to see an illusion. "Am i having a dream?"

"I guess not..."

"Come in, it is cold outside and you are just wearing a dress."

Scarlett walked in and looked around. She was expecting a mess but clearly Remus and Carina did a good job here. She did pet the dogs for awhile since they have missed their mummy a lot. Then they headed to the living room and sat down on the sofa in silence for couple of minutes until Sirius broke it down.

"My love..."

Sirius held her hand which she was scratching, it was ice cold. He took it to his lips and kissed it then put it on his cheek, leaned into it. She rubbed his cheek with her thumb softly and looked at him. He was her happiest memories and the worst memory at the same time. Scarlett was still loving him, how couldn't she? It wasn’t easy to erase him from her life, he has always been there. But also she was really upset with him, he broke her heart so bad that it's impossible to heal. Her heart and her brain were fighting to take the control. She was at an in-between stage, but her heart won the fight when she decided to hug Sirius. When he hugged her back, she broke down the tears that she was holding. It was so overwhelming for both. He couldn't hold back his tears either and the ex-couple cried together.

"I missed you Sirius... I missed us..."

"Me too baby. It is pointless to live without you by my side."

She looked at him with a serious look on her face. "Promise me you won't do anything to yourself! You did it once and this time i can't recover from it..."

"Promise, anything for you..." he kissed her hair and inhaled her rose scent. He would do anything to stay in this moment.

"I wish we had one more kiss..." Scarlett mumbled and leaned into him slowly. Sirius was impatient and kissed her red lips longingly. The kiss felt intoxicating.

"Scar, i love you baby... You are my one and only." he pulled her body closer to his, he wanted to feel her all over him. Scarlett was playing with his curls that she loved so much while kissing him back passionately. Their emotions took over everything and they were both lost in the kiss until they heard a knock on the door. She pulled away immediately as it was a waking up call for her.

"Were you waiting someone?"

He shook his head. "No. Maybe Carina came to look for you?"

"She doesn't know i am here, i was with Remus. Maybe him?"

"Then forget about it, i don't wanna leave your embrace." Sirius kissed her again but the knocking continued and the dogs kept barking at it. Scarlett sighed and got up to answer the door. When she opened the door, there wasn't Remus but Arabelle.

"Ah Miss Rose? I wasn't expecting to see you here. Is Sirius he-. Ah here he is!" An evil grin appeared on her lips.

Sirius has heard her high-pitched voice and came to see what’s going on. "What are you doing here!? I said i don't wanna see you ever again! Leave now!"

"I've just came here to check on you and maybe relax you little bit, you know how." She winked at him and continued. "But i see you are busy with your fragile rose, unfortunately, I wonder when she will wilt... If you need me just write and I will be on your service, byeee!" And she disappeared into the darkness of the night knowing very well that she caused a scene.

Scarlett was standing by the door like a sad ghost, her face was full of disappointment and sorrow.

"Scarlett love, i had no idea. I have never seen her after i fired her, i swear..." he tried to hold her but she took a step back away from him.

"I shouldn't have come here, i made a fool of myself..." tears were running down on her checks.

Sirius fell on his knees in front of her. "Believe me Scarlett, i swear on my life i have nothing to do with her! She is playing a game with us, i don't know what exactly! But believe me baby please...I love you and only you."

"I wish i could believe you..." She apparated and left him there all alone crying.

    Scarlett was so frustrated and overwhelmed after what happened. She didn't want to go inside the castle while she was in this mood because Carina would question her, so she decided to go for a walk on the wooden bridge of Hogwarts. She has never liked it though, she was scared of heights and also bridges but tonight she wasn't feeling any fear or the freezing cold of the November night. All the moments she had with Arabelle and the things she said to her were running through her mind nonstop; especially “when the fragile rose will wilt”. She was so lost in her thoughts that she didn't notice what she was doing until she saw the cliff underneath her. Now she was standing the other side of the safety fences, she had no idea how she has managed to do it. But even in that moment she didn't feel any fear. It felt like she was a puppet and controlled by someone else. She looked up at the sky, it was so dark that stars were shining perfectly but the one caught her eye the most: Sirius.

~

"Whenever we are not together, just look up the sky and i will be there for you Scarlett. I will never leave you all alone and I will be your light."

~

She looked down at the cliff once again. What if she took one more step? Would everything be fine? She removed one foot from the edge to the air, her skirt was dancing with the wind like it was calling her.

"SCARLETT! NO!"

The terrified voice echoed in the night and then running sounds followed it. It was none other than Severus Snape. He was picking some flowers that only blooms in the night for his potions then he noticed the red hair up in the bridge under the moon light. He has never felt that much scared in his whole life.

His voice has brought Scarlett back to reality, it felt like the dream-like curtain was removed from her eyes and now she was aware of what’s she doing and  she was scared truly. She was losing the feeling of her hands cause of the cold and she wasn't sure how long she could hold onto the fences and her shaking body wasn’t a help at all. But luckily Severus wasn’t so far away and he has rushed to her in an inhuman pace.

"I will help you, just hold onto me and i will pick you up. Scarlett listen to me." He was out of breath and adrenaline was running through his body.

"I cannot… İ am scared..." She whispered silently.

"You need to trust me. Turn your body to me slowly, I am holding you. And I will pick you up when you do it. I am here, nothing will happen to you."

She slowly did what he said and then wrapped her arms around his neck while he was picking her up and carrying her back to the other side of the fences carefully. Her whole body was shaking, and she collapsed on the ground with him.

"You are fine, you are fine Scarlett."

Severus was trying to calm her down but he was not any different than her. His heart was pacing so fast like it was going to rip his chest out. But he wrapped his head around the situation as quickly as possible and took his coat off to wrap it around her then he picked her up to carry inside. Scarlett was in a total shock and couldn't find herself to say or do anything. She just closed her eyes while snuggling into him.

    Severus carried Scarlett to his room and sat her down on the bed. Scarlett sat there with empty eyes, she couldn’t wrap her head around the situation at all yet. Severus stood in front of her for a while, he felt like she might vanish if he looks away. When he was sure everything is fine then he decided to light up the fireplace to warm up the cold room.

"Could you let Remus know that i am here?" Scarlett mumbled, she was just starting to feel herself again and finally spoke.

He nodded while brewing some hot tea for her. "You stay here, drink your tea and i will be right back." Severus wasn’t happy about leaving her alone but he wanted to do what she asked for.

Couple of minutes later he was back with Remus. Their bickering was heard before they showed up.

"Scarlett! What happened? Are you okay?" Remus run towards her worriedly. He couldn’t believe his ears when Severus told about the incident. 1 hour ago she was looking fine and he had no idea what happened with Sirius and she became that bad.

She shook her head as no. "Make up a lie for Carina please, i don't want her to see me like that..."

"Okay whatever you want but stay with me tonight. Come."

"I can take care of her better, Lupin." Severus stood between two of them stopping Remus from holding her.

"Don't try to take an advantage of the situation Severus."

"Remus don't, please..." Scarlett was begging, she couldn’t take an argument between them right now.

Remus sighed and rubbed her back. "I will write Carina that we are going to London and stay there tonight. She would believe it since i don't have any classes tomorrow. Okay?"

"Thank you, Remus."

"Let me know if you need anything anytime." He glanced at Severus one more time before left.

After Remus left the room, Severus sat down next to her on the bed.

"Did you warm up a bit?"

She nodded slowly. "If you weren't there tonight...I w-"

"Don't say it."  Severus wouldn't be able to forget that night till the day he dies. Once again, he realized how much he loves her and can't lose her.

"I am stupid, so stupid!" Scarlett talked to herself. When she thought about the night, she couldn't believe herself. She was really about to jump from the cliff.

"Don't wrong yourself, you are not a stupid woman."

"I went to see Sirius tonight then Arabelle showed up and i found myself edge of the cliff. If those things weren't stupid, then what?" She cried helplessly. "I don't know what am i doing or feeling... I am so lost."

"You need some time to heal, everything will be fine."

"Promise...?"

"I promise. If i am wrong, i will let you dye my hair pink."

A tiny smile formed on her lips. "You must be pretty sure then."

"I am." He smiled. "I will give you a potion, it will help you to relax."

"Okay. My whole body is aching..."

"Here, drink this." Severus did accio a potion bottle and handed it to Scarlett.

She did drink the colourless potion he gave but she grimaced her face because it tasted very bitter.

"Want some water?"

She shook her head and stared at the fire for a while blankly. "I was about to kill myself... for real..." Scarlett whispered.

"Scarlett look at me."

Her watery green eyes met with his black ones. Her eyes were like a forest that he got lost in them for a while then remembered to talk. "You are going through a hard time but you are a strong woman Scarlett, I know that. You just need to gain your power back then everything will be fine again. You will make a fresh start. And you are not alone in this. Your kids, parents, friends are here to help you anytime. You need to accept the situation and keep going for better."

She wiped her tears away with her shaky hands. He always found a way to comfort her and made her believe that everything's going to be alright.

"Thank you Sev." She looked into his eyes deeply. "Thank you for everything."

He smiled softly and patted her hand. "You should rest now. You sleep here in the bed and i will sleep on the chair."

"We can share the bed, i don't want you to sleep on the chair because of me. It is not like we never slept in the same bed before..."

Severus’s cheeks tinted with red a little bit. "If you are fine with that, okay..."

Scarlett nodded while taking her shoes off. Severus got his pyjamas and went to the bathroom to change his clothes in the meantime. When he was back, Scarlett was already in the bed with her eyes closed. He smiled at his view before turned the lights off.

"Good night..." she mumbled sleepily.

"Good night Scarlett."

He laid down and looked at her small body that laying next to him. After the end of their relationship, he didn't have anyone in his bed. And tonight there she was again, after 30 years. The bed was never warm enough without her. His eyes closed slowly while he was thinking about the past.

Taglist:

@snapefiction @lizlil @elizabeth-baelish @misselsbells06 @mais-e @lunnybunny12 @anfre109 @entirelymesmerising @wolvesofwinter13 @mrssnivellussnape @mestin-writes

If you wanna be on my taglist, let me know!

[babyboyblasty]

CHAPTER 10:

"You look nice, Deku" Uraraka smiled, her hands held behind her back as she rocked back and forth on the balls of her feet in a childish manner, looking at her green haired friend. "Is there anyone in particular you're trying to impress?" she gave him a knowing look that Izuku stuttered and blushed to.

"No! O-of course not" he immediately denied and averted his eyes when that only seemed to make Uraraka's smirk widen. Izuku knew he was a terrible liar and Uraraka could be very scary sometimes. "But um, hypothetically speaking.. if I /were/ trying to impress someone- which I'm not- but hypothetically speaking do you think they'll.. you know. Be impressed? Hypothetically."

Uraraka looked her friend up and down. Izuku's fashion sense has definitely improved since the beginning of their first year. Both Tsuyu and herself had made sure to teach Deku and Todoroki a thing or two about dressing themselves since they were completely clueless sometimes. Midoriya was wearing brown, cuffed corduroy pants with a forest green oversized short sleeve button up, a lighter green long sleeve underneath that to create layers. The red shoes were never going away though and Uraraka gave up in trying to get him to wear another pair of shoes. He looked good and Uraraka noticed how his hair was a bit neater too so he obviously put a bit of extra effort into trying to style his curls. In fact, looking around the common room it seemed that Deku wasn't the only one who put a little extra effort into their appearance today. Half the boys there looked like they were going off to a party instead of a casual class outing. Even Iida looked like he was trying out a new hairstyle. No glasses either.

"Umm, Uraraka-san?" Izuku waved his hand in front of the girl's face to get her attention. She zoned out for a bit there and she blinked, turning to face him again.

"Oh, right! Well, /hypothetically speaking/ right?" she smiled and he nodded, "I think they'll be very impressed." Deku beamed and her eyes shifted to Todoroki who was just arriving downstairs. "Oh, look! There's Todoroki-kun. Let's go talk" she grabbed Deku's hand in hers and took him with her. He looked very good! Todoroki's aesthetic was more of a simplistic/classy style with neutral colors. This time he decided to switch it up and was wearing a white t-shirt with an unbuttoned, loose fitting pale blue and white striped dress shirt over that. He had black jeans and white sneakers too. He looked very good. "Oooo~ is there anyone /you're/ trying to impress, Todoroki-kun?" Ochako teased.

"Yes."

Ochako didn't expect such a direct answer but giggled anyway at her blunt friend. Deku on the other hand didn't find it as funny.

"Is Bakugou here yet?" Shoto changed the subject and looked around the common room but didn't spot the explosion quirk user anywhere. He felt a little disappointed.

"No, Kacchan isn't here. Neither is Kirishima-kun" Izuku really tried to keep the bitterness out of his tone. He knew that they were best friends but did they really have to be glued at the hip 24/7? Deku doesn't like the way he starts to feel when he thinks of those two together but he can't help it.

"Oh" Shoto mumbled. There was an awkward silence where no one said anything for a few seconds until Uraraka couldn't stand it and broke it.

"So how are you feeling, Todoroki-kun? Are you still tired or are you feeling a bit better from earlier?" Ochako questioned. That got Izuku's attention and he turned to Todoroki with a curious expression. Was he sick? Todoroki didn't mention anything to him today. He wondered why he didn't tell him.

"I feel better, thank you. I'm excited to be going out with my friends" he smiled briefly and Izuku returned it. After that things started to go back to normal as they talked about what stores they wanted to go to and if they had anything in particular they wanted to buy. The common room was filled with brief conversation before the 'ding' of the elevator was heard and everyone turned to look at a nervous Kirishima standing on the far opposite side of a bored looking Bakugou. Izuku felt a knot form in his throat and Todoroki felt his heart skip a beat, their faces heating up a little at what girl Kacchan was wearing. He looked good. Hell, even if he was in his normal body and wore that he'd look good.

"You're here!" Mina rushed forward to hug her two friends in a crushing hug which Kirishima gladly returned. The girls may or may not be feeling smug at how everyone reacted to seeing Bakugou. Yeah, they did that.

"I said I would go with you extras, didn't I? Now let go, pinky" Bakugou groaned. She smiled wide before stepping back.

"This'll be so much fun!" Mina jumped up and down.

"Everyone please form a single file line for attendance! As class president I must make sure everyone is accounted for before we vacate school grounds" Iida made sure to grab everyone's attention by speaking loud and clear as well as waving his arms about. Where he pulled the clipboard from no one knows but Iida started to check off names in the class roster to submit to Aizawa sensei once they come back in a few hours. "Alright. Everyone is here. We can go now" he nodded in confirmation.

The class had to take the bus to go to the mall so Iida stayed by the door until everyone was inside before going in himself. Bakugou was planning to sit with Kirishima but the redhead as soon as he was in the bus went and sat beside Sero instead. Katsuki was confused since they always sit together and even Sero was looking between the pair in confusion. "You don't mind, right Bakubro?" Kirishima awkwardly scratched the back of his neck. Bakugou just shrugged and moved on to find an empty seat to which Kirishima let out a breath he didn't even know he was holding.

"What was that?" Sero questioned once Bakugou was out of earshot.

"What was what?" Kirishima turned to him.

"That. You always sit with Bakugou so why all of a sudden did you decide to sit next to me? I don't mind but I was a little caught off guard, man. You know, you've been acting weird ever since the night we played games in my room. Is everything cool?" Sero had an idea of what was happening but he wanted to hear it from Kiri himself.

"Yeah, everything's good. I just need to sort some things out for myself first" he explained and Sero nodded, leaving it at that. Kirishima appreciated that about Sero. He knew if it was Mina or Kaminari they wouldn't stop pestering him about it. Kirishima just wanted some time to hopefully figure out why he was all of a sudden feeling so weird around Katsuki.

On the other end of the bus, towards the back, Bakugou found an empty seat. Everyone else seemed to be already sitting with someone else but he didn't really mind it. Once seated, Bakugou put his elbow up on the edge of the window and looked outside. He felt someone slightly tap his shoulder though and looked up to a shy Koda. 'May I sit here?' he signed and Bakugou raised an eyebrow. He rolled his eyes and signed back 'go for it' and Koda smiled a little, quickly sitting down beside Bakugou. Aizawa did mention that because of his quirk, he may experience hearing loss in the future if he didn't take the proper precautions so Bakugou has been taking JSL classes from Koda since the beginning of their second year and developed a somewhat mutual understanding with the guy. He really wasn't all that bad, just a little quiet. And while they weren't friends friends, Bakugou knew that if he ever needed a quiet place to study or just hang out for a bit without talking, he could go to Koda's room. The same went for Bakugou. If Koda ever wanted to spar or wanted pointers to help in improving his fighting skills, Bakugou is available.

Now that everyone had a seat, the bus began to move. The ride was going to take approximately fifteen to twenty minutes so he just wanted to use the break to relax. Bakugou could tell Koda wanted to say something based on the way he would look at him every few minutes but then look away though. "What is it?" he finally asked a little less than halfway into the trip and Koda shook his head. "I know you want to say something, now what is it?"

Koda looked hesitant at first but then signed 'how are you feeling?' with a sincere look. Maybe if it was someone else Bakugou would have told them off for getting into his business but Koda was someone who earned his respect and admiration throughout their time together in UA and who he saw as an equal.

"Why do you ask?" he asked instead, a bit defensive, and Koda responded by signing 'this is a big change and I was just wondering how you were doing.' Bakugou shrugged. "It isn't something I can't handle. Besides, today is the last day of the quirk so I should be back to normal by tomorrow morning" Bakugou mumbled, adding in a "thanks" as an afterthought. Honestly speaking, Koda has been the only one who's asked him how he felt about this whole quirk situation. The rest of his classmates all just seemed to be having fun with it and while he didn't mind, it was nice to be asked.

'You're always welcome to come hang out with me and my bunny if you ever need quiet time,' Koda offered. 'He told me he misses the angry blonde boy with the warm hands" he joked. Bakugou smirked a little with a "tch, sure whatever. Tell 'im I miss the furball too" leaving his lips. After that Bakugou and Koda fell into a comfortable silence where Bakugou closed his eyes to rest for the few minutes they had left on the bus ride.

Everyone else in class 3-A never thought they'd see the day where they all wished they were in Koda's place. The anivoice boy was sitting perfectly still so as to not wake the pretty blonde that had leaned his head on the other's shoulder sometime along the trip and was now sleeping peacefully on him.

[word count: 1775]

( this fan art isn't in correlation with the story chapter but oH MY GOD LOOK HOW PRETTY GIRL BAKUGOU IS- 😩)

[crazy-loca-blog]

Spicy Newlywed Questions

A/N: Thanks a lot to the lovely @jamespotterthefirst for sending this weekly self-indulgence challenge. Please be advised that this is a 18+ edition of The Newlywed Game, so there might be some triggers if NS*FW topics make you feel uncomfortable. This time, all the answers will be below the cut.

Rating: 18+ (Mature)

Masterlist

~~*~~*~~*~~

Mild

Do you kiss and tell? Have you told your friends about your…"adventures"?

Ethan: I like to think that's where we set the limit on what we share about our relationship with our friends. So no.

Casey: Agreed... and yet, here we are publicly talking about our sex life... the hypocrisy...

*Laughs*

Casey: I'd say the closest we are to kiss and tell is when my brother guesses some of our "adventures" and he teases us about them... but we like to keep the mystery and we never confirm or deny anything.

My spouse looks the hottest in ____________.

Both, in unison: Naked!

*Laughs*

Ethan: No, for real. Seeing my wife naked every day is a blessing, but she's also the biggest teaser. Every time we attend some formal event, she makes her purpose to find the perfect dress to make me feel the luckiest man on the planet...

Casey: ...especially because you're the one taking those clothes off as soon as we get home...

Ethan: Exactly *smirks*

Casey: I have to admit there is something about Ethan when he's wearing his workout clothes... or when he's working out... he's lucky that Bryce and Raf are at the gym with him...

Ethan: How can you say something like that and then say that I'm lucky because Lahela and Aveiro are there with me?

Casey: You can always kick them out of the gym and tell them you're going to be busy with me... I'm sure they'll get the message.

What song best describes that night after the country club (1.15)? You know which one…

Casey: Fallin' For You by Colbie Caillat.

Ethan: *surprised* That was fast!

Casey: Yeah... the fact that I never pushed you away doesn't mean that I wasn't a mess about my feelings for you, and you know it. I think that was the moment where I realized that we were no joke and I stopped lying to myself and I just began to admit I was falling for you. What about you?

Ethan: I think Just A Kiss by Lady A summarizes very well how I felt about us at that moment.

Casey: Now... if you really, really want to make this question spicy... I'd say You're Makin' Me High by Toni Braxton *smirks*

Ethan: Should I listen to it?

Casey: At your own risk...

*Ethan listens to the song... Is he blushing?*

Casey: I told you so... *smirks*

Hottest thing my spouse has ever done is ___________. (Doesn’t have to be dirty)

Both, in unison: Existing!

*Laughs*

Ethan: *looking at Casey* Should I tell a dirty one or should I keep it PG?

Casey: *smiles* Whatever you want, babe... I'm fine with it.

Ethan: She made a professional photoshoot not so long ago... nothing explicit, but very suggestive... and whenever she wants to tease me, she sends me just one picture to my phone... all I can say is that I can't wait to find her to go home... or to an on call room... or to a supply closet... or to any of our offices... whatever is closest at the moment.

Casey: You really enjoy those, don't you? *smirks*

Ethan: I like to think we both enjoy them *smirks*

Casey: Oh, believe me, I do! Well, to keep a balance, I'll go with a PG one. Ethan fighting for what he believes in is one of the hottest things he'll do in public. Then in private, only a few people are lucky to see the real him. He goes full protective mode for those he care about, and that's irresistible to me.

Who said “Let’s make out” first? Where was it?

*Casey points at Ethan*

Casey: He didn't say it, but...

Ethan: I couldn't help it, she always looks beautiful, but that day... *sighs*

Casey: He surprised me... I mean, I wanted it to happen, but I didn't expect him to feel the same way about me.

On a scale of 1-10, what would you rate their seduction skills?

Casey: He is a solid 12... he knows exactly what to do... he has never failed, not even once... and it's frustrating...

Ethan: *laughing* Why?

Casey: Because I can't play hard to get...

Ethan: Casey is... *looks at her*

Casey: I know I'm awful at it, so be honest, I won't get mad...

Ethan: She is a 10...

Casey: *surprised* What? I expected like a 5 or a 6...

Ethan: That's exactly why you're a 10... you're not even aware of your power over me... when I tell you I'm not rational when I'm around you... I'm not joking, dear...

What bathing suit does your spouse look the best in?

Ethan: There is this white and brown that she wore during our honeymoon that fits her so well. But she has two that she literally calls the "RIP Ethan" bathing suits. She wears a trikini when we're at the pool with our friends and a very tiny red bikini when she's waiting for me at home by the pool after her shift... because yeah, she's such a teaser...

Casey: Does it work?

Ethan: We tend to disappear for a while when our friends are visiting, so what do you think? *smirks*

Casey: I'm picking this one at random because honestly, when you're wearing a bathing suit I don't care much about what you cover, but more about what you can't cover with it *winks*

~~*~~*~~*~~

XTRA HOT

What’s a surefire way to turn on your spouse?

*Ethan whispers something on Casey's ear*

Casey: *very uncomfortable* This... what he just did... he just knows I'm weak and I can't resist him when he talks to me like that...

*Ethan gives her a knowing look and smirks*

Casey: *even more uncomfortable* And that... that look... can I have some water?

Ethan: When she gives me a very seductive look and bites her lip... I just can't...

Casey: Like this? *She gives him a knowing look while she bites her lip*

Ethan: *very uncomfortable* Next question, please?

Who makes the most noise?

Ethan: *pointing at Casey* She does...

Casey: Guilty as charged... you should feel okay about it, it means you're doing your job perfectly

Ethan: I would never dare to complain... I actually love the effect of your moans on me... *winks*

Who loves foreplay the most?

Both, in unison: Both!

*Laughs*

Ethan: Really... we both love a good foreplay... not only we like trying new and different things, we really like taking our time...

Casey: And when we say "taking our time", it may even mean teasing each other all day... messages, kisses, some subtle touching, you name it...

Ethan: And it only gets better if the other part doesn't expect it... I really enjoy it when you can cut the sexual tension with a knife...

One round or multiple– Which do you prefer?

Both, in unison: Multiple!

*Laughs*

Ethan: Come on... again?

Casey: I think it actually depends... and I know Ethan will agree with me on this, so I think I'm speaking for both of us... it's more about quality than about quantity... we are lucky to have both, but if we must choose one, we'd definitely choose quality.

*Ethan just nods in agreement*

Best night/sex you’ve ever had with your spouse?

*They look at each other for a while*

Casey: I don't know actually... it's not like I have a list of our best times...

Ethan: Me neither... but I can think of a few times...

Casey: Yeah, me too... like our first time...

Ethan: ...after the attack...

Casey: ...that night by the river...

Ethan: ...when we disappeared for two full weeks, and no one knew we were together...

Casey: ...the diagnostics team office...

Ethan: ...the on call room...

Casey: ...that quickie at the museum...

Ethan: ...when we got engaged...

Casey: ...our wedding night...

Ethan: ...when we moved in to our new home...

Casey: ...pool sex... all the time...

Ethan: ...I think we could go on forever...

Casey: Agreed... next question?

Morning or night? What’s your favorite place to have sex in?

Both, in unison: Both!

*Laughs*

Casey:*laughing* Ethan, stop! We can't keep giving the same answers half of the time! This is supposed to be sexy and hot, not funny!

Ethan: *laughing* Don't blame me! Maybe we're just discovering why we work so well... *smiles*

Casey: Well... even though we both like to try different places, I think nothing beats our bed, at night, after our shifts, and when we can have all the time to enjoy ourselves...

Ethan: Agreed... but the early morning shower is a close second...

Casey: It has taken you a while, but I have to admit you're finally beginning to convince me of all the perks of morning sex... especially when it's you who wakes me up. *winks*

Ethan: It's been a real challenge, you're a heavy sleeper, so I feel honored...

Casey: You should...

Who dominates in the bedroom?

Casey: He does, 99% of the time. And who am I kidding, it takes me to cloud nine, so I really enjoy it. But I like to think I dominate the teasing that leads to him to dominate in the bedroom.

Ethan: I had never thought about it that way... that's actually a good answer, dear.

Casey: Thank you, babe.

Casey, what’s your favorite outfit to wear for him? Ethan, what’s your favorite Casey wears?

Casey: What I'm wearing right now... it's both my favorite and Ethan's.

Ethan: Your working clothes? No offense dear, you look really sexy, but I don't think that's my favorite outfit...

Casey: I don't mean this outfit, but actually the one that's under it...

Ethan: Are you wearing the...

Casey: Nope...

Ethan: Then, it's the...

Casey: Not really...

Ethan: You bought a new one that I haven't seen yet...

*Casey gives him a knowing look while she bites her lip*

Ethan: *very uncomfortable* How many questions are left?

What’s your favorite thing your spouse does in bed?

Both, in unison: Oral!

*Laughs*

Casey: *laughing* Shut... up! I can't be serious if we keep doing this! Well, I can proudly say that my husband knows how to use his tongue for more than just talking... and I wonder if he ever thought about becoming a surgeon because his hands are a close second...

Ethan: I can say the same... she's give me the best handjobs and blowjobs of my life, and I'm not ashamed to admit it. But when she is on top, things go to a whole new level for me.

Casey: I do enjoy when he is the one on top, so that I can look him in the eyes... and when he takes me against the wall... or against the window... or in the pool... *she begins to blush*

Ethan: *very uncomfortable* Are we done?

Casey: *very uncomfortable* I think so...

Ethan: *whispers on her ear* Your office or mine?